Greasy Money : The Liquor Guide

Hey! Let’s talk about Trailer Park Boys: Greasy Money a little more today.

Actually, let’s not talk, per se. This is going to be more of a mini-guide than the usual opinion piece. Greasy Money is a fairly standard idle game, though it does have a number of bells and whistles to differentiate itself from the thousands of other idle games on the iTunes App Store and Kongregate.com. As many of those other games, it deals with several different types of currency.

First, there’s cash. It’s fun, because there’s actually a story conceit as to why you’re making millions upon billions of dollars in the game. Usually that just gets completely ignored. Cash is mainly earned from your businesses. It can also be gained by cracking open trunks, which is kind of waste, because anything else you get from a trunk will be infinitely more valuable. Literally the only thing you can do with cash is invest it back in your businesses to attract more customers, which will increase the business’ cash output. And so the cycle continues.

Next are the hashcoins. These are the premium currency, and while the game does dole out a fair amount in the tutorial seasons, you will typically have to pay real money for more. You can also find one or two in a trunk from time to time, but they’re going to accumulate very slowly. Hashcoins are spent in the in-game store to buy premium trunks, time skips, and liquor.

Speaking of liquor, that’s the final currency type. This is the semi-premium currency, in that you don’t have to buy it with your heard-earned hashcoins, but you’re not going to be earning a useable amount very quickly. Liquor also happens to be the most valuable stuff in the game, as it’s used to upgrade your businesses and characters, and to buy new cards. There are tons of ways to get liquor, but most don’t pay out very well. The purpose of this guide is to tell you all the ways to get your liquor so that you can make the most out of your time with the game.

Side note: I suppose that technically, the character/business cards are also a form of currency, but forget those for now. They are essentially just a specialized form of liquor, anyhow.

That said, let’s take a look at all the ways you can earn liquor:

Continue reading Greasy Money : The Liquor Guide

Monthend Video Game Wrap-Up – April 2017

~ Game Over ~

NieR: Automata (PS4) – Finished up and got that sweet platinum trophy. Loved every minute of it. I laughed, I cried (multiple times), and I have to say it’s a worthy follow-up to one of my favourites.

PaRappa the Rapper Remastered (PS4) – Yeah, I bashed my head against this wall long enough to get to the end, but I doubt I will ever truly understand how to play well.

Blaster Master Zero (Switch) – What a stellar game! The original Blaster Master is much too hard for me, so this reboot was a very nice way to appreciate the game without all the headaches.

The Unfinished Swan (PS4) – A weird little first-person adventure game that is constantly playing with how you get around its world. Read more here.

Wonder Boy: The Dragon’s Trap (Switch) – Beautiful remake of a TG-16 platformer that I didn’t realize that I already own on Wii Virtual Console. Oh well! It’s definitely worth buying again!

Pic-A-Pix Color (WiiU) – Honestly, I’m as surprised as you are that I’m playing a Wii U game. But then again, it’s picross, so maybe not. Also it’s crossbuy with 3DS, so I’ll likely play it again soon!

Continue reading Monthend Video Game Wrap-Up – April 2017

Is it Greasy, or Gree-hee-heeasy?

The Trailer Park Boys mobile game, Greasy Money, was released yesterday. 4/20. Of course.

I’ve put some time into it, and it’s basically just another clicker game (“waiting simulator” if you prefer), but with a little bit of added complexity. So it’s really striking all the sweet spots for me.

The one thing that I really dislike about it is that while it has a unique plot, all of the story beats after the opening cutscene are stolen wholesale from the show. Even all the jokes are just pulled straight from a list of the show’s most quotable lines. It’s really lazy. Thumbs down.

But that’s fairly minor. It’s still one of those games that worms its way into your life and only lets go once you decide to turn off notifications. Considering that, I’ll probably stick with it longer than any other mobile game ever. So maybe like a week?

Monthend Video Game Wrap-Up – February 2017

Sometimes I wonder why I even bother to do these introductory blurbs for the Monthend posts. I guess they’re more traditional than anything at this point.

Anyway, thank Zeus that February is finally over. Two more days to Switch!

~ Game Over ~

Resident Evil 7: Biohazard (PS4) – This may be my new jam. Like back in the day when I got really into Silent Hill and then Resident Evil DS, and beat them like a hundred times each. That’s what’s happening here. I’ve beaten it three times now. Currently working on hard mode and DLC.

Drakengard 3 (PS3) – Cleared branches A, B, and C. Played some of the DLC chapters, and got stuck on the intensely hard final boss of branch D.

Citadale (WiiU) – A slightly above-par Castlevania clone that is packed with just enough little annoyances that it comes out looking shoddier than it should. I intend to review it in full.

The Perplexing Orb (WiiU) – Booted it up because I thought it would be good for this article, but then I ended up really enjoying it. Kind of a cheap Monkey Ball wannabe.

Ninja Senki DX (PS4) – Free PS+ game. Lured me in by looking like a Game Boy Color game, but I only got to level 4 before I said “Eff it, I hate this” and deleted it.

Continue reading Monthend Video Game Wrap-Up – February 2017

Glub glub!

In the late days of September, I download a free app called Plant Nanny. While it was not a game, it was an attempt to gamify water. Specifically, drinking enough water throughout the day. I tried to keep with it for a while, but near the end of November I got to the point where I just didn’t care anymore. Which is sad, because in doing so I sentenced a bunch adorable virtual plants to their deaths.

screen568x568The idea of the app is that for every glass of water you drink a day, you give your plant a drink of water as well. It has a little experience bar, and when the bar fills, the plant grows a bit. After a few stages of growth, the plant will reach its final stage, you put it out in the garden and plant a new… plant. Fully grown plants will also drop a seed every 20 hours, which is not for planting, but rather is currency to buy exciting new species of plants. And so the cycle continues.

The first thing I learned from this app is that I don’t drink anywhere near enough water. I found myself struggling to try to fit in so many cups of water a day. Fortunately, Plant Nanny has a helpful reminder feature that sends a notification to your phone every two hours (between 8AM and 10PM, so as not to disturb your sleep). In reality, the annoyance of that constant reminder was part of Plant Nanny’s downfall.

The second thing that I learned is that when I do drink enough water, I have to pee all the damn time. Which, you know, makes perfect sense, but was still annoying. I won’t get into details about my bathroom habits, but let’s just say that a number of people have commented on how seldom I seem to use the toilet.

Anyway, despite the positive feedback loop of growing cute little plants and the fact that it was ostensibly having a positive impact on my health, I just couldn’t be bothered with it anymore. The reminders became grating, and I started to feel like I really just didn’t want to ingest that much water every day. I still think the thing’s calculations are off and it was telling me to drink way more than necessary. But I’m too lazy to actually do the math so we’ll never know for sure.

So now I’m back to drinking like half a cup of water a day. It’s probably not great for my body, but I don’t feel any different either way. You were cute, Plant Nanny, but in the end, I just didn’t care enough to keep it up. Like with pretty much everything else in my life.

Other things that happen

I’m fairly well-known as the kind of person who doesn’t like to do things that require effort and/or pants. But last weekend, I did a whole lot of things! New(ish) things! Including but not limited to:

  • Talked to the greeter and took the time to craft my own burger at McDonald’s
  • Ate at McDonald’s on Friday, Saturday and Sunday (I’m not proud of this one)
  • Went on a late-night Pokémon Go expedition to the zoo
  • Met and played with a new puppy
  • Checked out an annual craft show for the first time
  • Bought expensive artisanal mustards
  • Was disappointed that I didn’t find a candle that I liked
  • Performed an “Irish Goodbye”
  • Helped my grandparents move into an apartment
  • Went through a regular checkout lane instead of the express checkout at Safeway because I wanted a specific cashier

What an exciting life I lead!

A month with Pokémon GO

Pokémon GO hasn’t been out in Canada for a while month yet, but due to some sneaky sneakiness, I’ve had it for a month now. I was totally enamoured of it for the first few days, but how about now? When it comes to phone games, I often get very excited at first and then cool on them just as quickly. Did Pokémon GO avoid that fate?

The answer is both yes and no.

While I was very excited about AR Pokémon times at first, the massive load on the servers made the experience very touch-and-go. So I did sort of let my infatuation with it fade, as it was always a gamble whether I’d actually be able to play or not. Things seem to be getting better, as the game is locking up significantly less often now than it did even two weeks ago. Then again, I might just be getting lucky.

As is often the case with multiplayer-focused games, the actual “game” part of Pokémon GO seems like a massive waste of time for me, and not worth the trouble. There’s the subset of people who will invest all of their time in the game and dominate it, leaving those of us who play casually with no hope of even a temporary victory. And of course, since this is a phone game, folks with cash to burn can also just pay to win. I put a couple dollars in to buy a bag upgrade because I found myself constantly running out of item space, but that’s all I’m ever going to spend on it. So it seems completely futile for me to even try to play the gym battles when they’re stocked with Pokémon at levels that I can’t fathom.

However, I do find it fun to simply wander around and catch Pokémon. The thrill of the hunt is enough for me right now, but I’m sure that it’ll wear off before long. Exploration options are pretty limited when your only method of travel is by foot and you’re also quite lazy. I feel like before long, my Pokémon GO experience will dwindle down to walking around with the app open to hatch all those eggs. That seems to be the real best hope of catching them all.

It’s no secret that I’m a bit of a contrarian, and as weird as it is, I’m a little put off by the massive hype surrounding the game. I should be ecstatic that more people are into something Pokémon-related than ever before, but for whatever reason I find it making me want to distance myself from the phenomenon until it dies down a bit. I know it’s ridiculous, and I hate myself for being such a hipster douche.

So yeah, time will tell. I was one of the few who were incredibly excited about PoGo before it launched, which makes it odd that I’m not as over the moon about it as so many others. Maybe a couple updates with new features will truly rekindle my flame for it, but for now, it’ll just be a thing I may or may not boot up when I go for a walk. Full disclosure: It’s probably going to get booted up more often than not.

Also I still inexplicably want the stupid bracelet. What the heck is wrong with me?

Monthend Video Game Wrap-Up – July 2016

Sometimes I think that I need to grow out of being upset that I don’t get summer vacation any more. I mean, it’s been well over a decade since I finished high school. In the time that I’ve been out of school, kids have started and finished school. But you know what? Nuts to that. I miss having two months to do whatever I damn well pleased.

~ Game Over ~

Final Fantasy VII (PC) – I’m amazed at how much shorter this game is than I remembered. I mean, I suppose it’s in part from not having sought out all the ultimate weapons and other fancy doo-dads, but even with a few hours of grinding and breeding a gold chocobo, the final time clocked in at under 40 hours. Crazy! (The time investment for prepping to fight the Emerald and Ruby Weapons is a whole other story.)

BOXBOXBOY! (3DS) – When I finished BOXBOY!, the only thing in the world that I wanted was more BOXBOY!. And now I have it! And it’s sooooooooooo good! And the ending suggests that there could be up to three more sequels. Hooray!

Continue reading Monthend Video Game Wrap-Up – July 2016

Pokémon makes me Go places

I’ve had it for only a matter of hours, and Pokémon Go, the new mobile AR game from Niantic, has already persuaded me to explore a little and check out places I never would have gone otherwise. Since the game encourages you to check out local landmarks (historic sites, parks, murals, statues, etc), I’ve already seen a few things around my workplace that I haven’t noticed in the four years I’ve been here. It’s even cooler when the associated landmarks have little blurbs about them, to add learning to the fun and exercise.

Good on you, Pokémon Go. Good on you.

I’m still not gonna buy that massively overpriced bracelet, though. I want it, but even I cannot justify the cost.

Monthend Video Game Wrap-Up – May 2016

I’ve been trying real hard to focus on one game per system at a time over the last few months, but I’m failing at every turn. It seems like I’m constantly getting distracted by something else, be it new or half-complete. Anyway, May was a huge step in the right direction, with a greater number of finished games than “in progress” games for this first time since… maybe it’s just the first time ever? Of course, I had to throw some (admittedly hefty) demos in there to make the grade, so maybe it’s moot.

~ Game Over ~

Zelda: Twilight Princess HD (WiiU) – It feels wrong to say it for some reason, but I think Twilight Princess is one of my favourite Zeldas. I think the only thing that I truly dislike about it is the stupid canoe minigame. The forced-wolf sections in the first half of the game do feel a bit like unnecessary padding, but even those don’t really bother me all that much. I even like the “acres and acres of nothing” Hyrule Field.

WiiU_screenshot_TV_019E5

Bravely Default (3DS) – I decided, now that the sequel is out, that I’ve been putting this off for too long. So I beat it. Then I wrote too many words about it. What I didn’t write there is that the final boss seemed rally cheap and annoying on my first try, but then once I knew his tricks, I stomped him into the ground with very little trouble.

Bravely Second: The Ballad of the Three Cavaliers (3DS) – Officially, it’s just the demo for Bravely Second, but it’s got a unique scenario and took me about seven hours to beat. I thought that I was burned out on Bravely, but this demo really hooked me and I just may splurge on Second in the near future.

The Park (PC) – I bought this immediately after someone suggested to me that it was a Five Night’s at Freddy’s clone. That is not the case at all. It’s a still a spooky game, but it is a walking simulator instead of a security guard simulator and there are zero killer animatronics. I was still pleased, because the story was pretty good. Unfortunately, my PC could just barely run it, so the choppiness kind of ruined the mood.

Resident Evil Revelations 2 – Episode 3 (PC) – Surprisingly, this game has one of the least terrible sewer levels ever. Well, design-wise. Technically, the water was too fancy, which made the computer so unhappy and slowed everything down to a crawl, and made the game very difficult to play. Otherwise, it had a cool factory explosion and a great boss fight.

Resident Evil Revelations 2 – Episode 4 (PC) – A surprisingly brief chapter for Claire and Moira, then the longest chapter in the game for Barry and Natalia. It was really great, though, and had a pretty decent final boss. I can tell you right now that I will be replaying this one many times.

Pocket Card Jockey Demo (3DS) – A game about horse racing, in which you race horses by playing a variation of solitaire that I am not familiar with. It’s a lot of fun, but truth be told, I don’t think I’m going to buy it. It’s deceptively deep, and that’s not really what I’m looking for.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Arcade (360) – Decided to play it a bit because I have been jonesing for some old-school TMNT action for months now. I didn’t actually finish it, but I was at the second-last stage and I would have finished it if I’d had more time. But I did get the fix that I needed. Close enough.

~ Now Playing ~

Monster Hunter Explore (iOS) – Do you remember Monster Hunter: Dynamic Hunting? I thought it was a passable way to get a MonHun fix in a pinch, but Explore is so much better. Its plays much more like normal Monster Hunter, just pared down for the mobile audience. It’s still not completely fulfilling, but it’s certainly a good deal of fun.

Hyrule Warriors Legends (3DS) -I took a long break from this to finish off Bravely Default and the Bravely Second demo, and now I’m neck deep in Zelda Musou again. I’ve finally finished the Great Sea adventure map to 100% completion, at least.

Final Fantasy VII (PC) – Yep, this happened. For whatever reason, this time around I feel like I’m seeing a lot of things that remind me of Super Mario RPG. Also whenever anything silly or funny happens I think about how joyless the remake will be and it makes me sad.

Mini Mario & Friends: Amiibo Challenge (WiiU) – I wrote enough words about this already.

Lost Reavers (WiiU) – A free, online loot-’em-up of sorts. It’s not especially good, but I’ve put in several hours because… well, I’m not sure why I kept it up. I guess it’s fairly fun, despite feeling like a C-tier game from a couple generations ago. Probably because it’s a multiplayer game that is 100% cooperative. That’s a big draw for me.

Dark Souls (360) – Yeah I’m playing this again. New Game+ is, well, hard. Which is the opposite of what I normally expect from NG+. Oh, Dark Souls. Played up to the point of defeating Quelaag, not sure how far I’m ultimately going to take this run.