I hate healthy eating

You know what? I friggin’ hate yogurt.

But this is no surprise to me. I’ve never liked it ever since I was a kid, and I still don’t. Regardless, I’m eating the stuff nearly every day now, having replaced my daily sandwich with a cup of plain Greek yogurt and blueberries, but it’s not getting any better. It’s not growing on me and I am not acquiring a taste for it.

Eating healthy in general blows. Maybe it needs more than a month to take, since I’ve made a pretty massive shift in my eating habits all at once, but I’m already sick of it. Replacing candy and chips with nuts and legumes is presumably good for me, but I haven’t lost a pound and I don’t feel any better either physically or mentally. All I feel is the salad-shaped hole in my life that used to be filled with junk food.

I’m highly considering going back to processed junk and fast food. It’ll probably be way easier just to learn to accept being fat and out of shape.

Migraine Watch: August 2, 2018

Another migraine this evening. Not really sure from whence it came, but it did. I haven’t got a damn clue what triggered it, as life has been fairly good lately. If there’s been any one thing stressing me out, I hate to admit that I’ve been feeling intensely lonely as of late. Has it been weighing on my soul that heavily? My sleeping hasn’t been great, but it hasn’t been so bad that I feel it’s affecting me. I’ve heard that sharp changes in diet can trigger migraines, but I’ve been eating healthier than ever before over the last month, and I have a hard time believing that a positive change like that could cause my brain to feel like it’s self-destructing.

Anyway, it really did come out of the blue. I was sitting on the couch after dinner, playing some Picross, when I suddenly noticed that my vision was starting to blur more than usual. I popped on my glasses, but they did nothing to help. I tried to deny it for a bit, but it was obviously the aura of an oncoming migraine, so I quickly made my way to the bathroom and popped an ibuprofen. I then abandoned the Picross and decided to just shut off all the lights and hop into bed.

That’s when my left leg went all tingly. Over a short period of time, it made its way up my body, through my arm and finally into my jaw. I would say the tingling lasted maybe twenty minutes at most, and by then I could tell that my vision had corrected itself, even in the dark. Though at this point, I could feel the pain in my head begin, and being curled up in bed became an extra boon, because I suddenly caught a terrible case of the chills. Overall, a varied and somewhat long-lasting sequence of auras, but fairly normal and not nearly as scary as the times when I have completely lost my vision or ability to comprehend language.

I’m writing this about an hour after the aura onset, and all the extra symptoms have gone. Now it’s just a relatively mild throbbing in the right side of my head. Significantly less crippling than it could be, so I’m pretty glad I downed that pill. All things considered, this is probably about as well as a migraine can go. I really just wish there had been some clear link to any previous attacks, because I’d love to know what’s triggering these migraines so that I could cut it out of my life.

Monthend Video Game Wrap-Up: July 2018

~ Game Over ~

The Awesome Adventures of Captain Spirit (PS4) – A free “prologue” for Life is Strange 2. I’m still not entirely clear on whether this will have anything to do with the full game or not.

Mega Man 7 (Switch) – I’m usually pretty hard on MM7, but playing it right after MM8 made me realize that it’s actually not all that bad! Except for Slash Man. He can go suck an egg.

Bloodstained: Curse of the Moon (Switch) – Nightmare mode run for true(?) ending.

Bloodstained: Curse of the Moon (Switch) – Another replay, Zangetsu-only this time.

Mega Man 2 (Switch) – Wait, Mega Man’s feet are slippery in this one, too? Why do I not remember this? Maybe that’s why I don’t think it’s quite as perfect as MM3.

Mega Man 3 (Switch) – Speaking of which, I did that too.

I Am Setsuna. (Switch) – I’m glad I played it, but something about it felt hollow. Maybe because the team very clearly wanted to make a Chrono Trigger sequel but weren’t allowed the license.

Fran Bow (PC) – The first two chapters of the game are very interesting and spooky, and then it kind of veers off in a completely different fantasy-styled direction before circling back to spooky.

Tales of Berseria (PS4) – It took about 30 hours before the plot finally got interesting and the characters started growing on me. But this may have been Stockholm Syndrome setting in.

Heavy Rain (PS4) – I prefer to try to find the positives in every game I play, but this one… While the high-level story was interesting, pretty much everything else about it was plain ol’ bad.

Mega Man X (Switch) – Yes, I have two portable versions of Mega Man X already, but I never take my 3DS or PSP out with me anymore. Plus, this one comes with all the sequels!

Rockman X (Switch) – The X Legacy Collection allows you to play the Japanese versions of all included games, so… I did that. As it turns out, not much was changed for the localization!

Mega Man X2 (Switch) – Maybe it’s because I play it much less frequently, but X2 is significantly tougher than the original. A little trolly too, in regards to the placement of several power-ups.

Mega Man X3 (Switch) – And then you get to this one, which is ridiculously tough, and even moreso if you’re trying a buster-only run. But at least it gives you a bunch of cool new abilities.

~ Now Playing ~

MGSV: The Phantom Pain (PC) – I bless the rains down in Africa, gonna cover up all of the sounds from my footsteps, ooh-ooh.

Pokémon Quest (Switch) – I’d like to complain about the completely erratic difficulty spikes, but that’s freemium for you! And I’m certainly not paying a cent into this one.

Slain: Back From Hell (Switch) – It’s kind of like if Doom and Castlevania had baby, and then that baby got really into heavy metal. Which is to say I love this game.

Octopath Traveler (Switch) – It’s a little bit too talky, but the battle system is excellent and a ton of fun. Feels a little bit like a more hands-on FFXIII, in a way. (NB: I’m a big fan of FFXIII.)

Soul Blazer (SNES) – I really adore Illusion of Gaia, but had never played its prequel, so I hacked my tiny SNES to do so. It’s quite good! I just need to make some more time for it.

Mega Man X Legacy Collection (Switch) – I’ve been listing the individual games here as I play them, but the new X Challenge mode can’t fit in that way. Short review: it is BONKERS.

Wherein I type words about Mega Man X again

If there’s only one absolutely consistent thing in my life, it’s my love for Mega Man X. And it’s not just because I’m a card-carrying fanboy of (mostly) all things Mega Man, but because I firmly believe that it is one of the best video games ever made. It is probably about as close to flawless as any game will ever come, and even after playing it seventeen million times, I still get a kick out of it on each and every replay.

With the recent release of the Mega Man X Legacy Collections, I have now purchased this game somewhere between six and eight times, which gives it the top billing for games that I have purchased more than once. I fully admit that I have a problem. I bought the original cartridge on SNES, the Mega Man X Collection on Gamecube, the stellar remake Maverick Hunter X on PSP, the generally sub-par iPhone port, the Virtual Console release on 3DS, and now the X Legacy Collection on Switch. I can’t recall for sure whether I bought it on Virtual Console for Wii or Wii U, but I’d say that the likelihood for at least one of them is pretty high.

The X Legacy Collection has added a couple neat new wrinkles to the mix. In fact, it it hadn’t I probably wouldn’t have even bothered writing this thing. The smallest, but most mind-blowing thing of all is something I discovered when poking around to see if I could change the control layout (you can’t): if you have a special weapon selected and press L and R at the same time, it’ll automatically unequip the weapon and put you back to the X-Buster. This is a huge revelation because I thought you had to scroll through them all individually, or use the pause menu to swap. It’s not really a game-changer, but it’s a fun little trick that I never knew about, despite having played through the game so many times.

Another neat thing is that the X Legacy Collection includes pre-release trailers of all the included games. Though nearly all of them are in Japanese, it’s still cool to see that footage of earlier versions of the games, and pick out all the things that changed. I’ve only watched the MMX trailer so far, but I was delighted to see enemies that didn’t make it into the full version, little graphical changes, and some level layouts that got changed around slightly.

Lastly, you can choose to play either the North American or Japanese versions of all the games on the collection, and astoundingly enough, I’ve never actually played a Japanese version of any Mega Man X game. So I decided to check out Rockman X, and to my surprise, there really weren’t many changes made for the localization. Aside from the edited logo and text boxes being resized to accommodate the different languages, it seems like the only thing that changed are the bosses’ names. And maybe –maybe- they upped the drop rate for health pickups in the North American version, but it’s impossible to really know without looking at the actual code. It just seems like they aren’t quite as plentiful as I’m used to.

(Note: The Cutting Room Floor reveals a few other itty-bitty changes that I would have never noticed, and says nothing either way about drop rates.)

I said before that I think Mega Man X is as close to perfect as any video game is ever going to get, and I stand by that. Part of that is owed to its simplicity; it’s harder to get things wrong when you’re not bloating your game with superfluous features and systems (see nearly every sequel). But most of all, I just don’t think that there are very many things that you’d write up as problems. The only major one is that the final boss is too hard. Compounded by the fact that it’s a string of three fights in a row, the final form hits so hard that only the best players will be able to defeat it without draining all four of their sub-tanks. Combine that with the fact that he’s got a tiny hitbox that is only vulnerable to the least practical weapon in X’s arsenal, and you’ve got a real pain in the butt on your hands.

Aside from that, my other complaints are relatively minor: when you use a password, neither your sub-tanks’ stored energy or your progress through Sigma’s fortress are saved. The sub-tanks are a minor pain, since you can grind health pick-ups fairly quickly to fill them again, but the lost progress in Sigma’s fortress is a little harder to swallow. The levels are short -maybe five minutes each- but it’s still a pain to have to blast your way through them again if you started making your way through and had to take a break.

Anyway, I think that’s about enough of a spiel for today. Lord knows that I’ve already published enough material about Mega Man X that I don’t need to go on for another thousand words, though I’ve never written an actual review. And it’s not like this is going to be the last time I write about it either. I just thought it would be fun to go over a few unique little nuggets of info about the game that not everyone would be aware of. With the X Legacy Collections absorbing all my thoughts lately, I wouldn’t be surprised if some more writing about the rest of the series pops up in the near future.

Octopath Traveler: First Impressions

Octopath Traveler was one of the games revealed at the first big Switch event way back in January of 2017. As a retro-styled JRPG from the same team at Square-Enix that did Bravely Default and its sequel, I was immediately interested. Over time, it even managed to become one of my most hotly anticipated major Switch releases, despite the fact that I ignored both demos for the sake of being able to get the most out of the full release.

And now, I have had the game for three full days and have only been able to put just shy of three hours into it. Which is weird, because usually when I get a game that I’m this hyped about, that’s basically all I’ll do during the release weekend. (Or for the next two months, if it’s a Xenoblade game.) Even though I haven’t been able to spend a lot of time with it, I’ve already got a lot of strong feelings about Octopath Traveler, and most of them are good!

Most importantly, the premise of the game is that you’re following the stories of eight different characters, who will (presumably) all meet up and join forces to defeat a greater evil, much like in Dragon Quest IV. The difference here is that while DQIV take you on a guided tour of all the characters’ stories in a predetermined order, Octopath lets you choose your starting character, and the order in which you meet up with everyone else. It’s almost like a Mega Man RPG!

I really like this format, as while the stories are always going to be the same, it’ll encourage replays, as you can try different paths through the game. I’ve heard that dialogue changes depending on who is in your party, and that your initial character choice will affect certain parts of the game. The freedom to go about as you please also makes me wonder if you don’t have to recruit everyone? Or if you can even choose to play the entire game with a single character? Who knows! I don’t! And I’m not looking it up ‘cause I don’t want spoilers!

Anyway, I started the game as H’aanit the huntress. At least to me, she seemed like the obvious choice. With weapon proficiencies in bows and axes (the best weapons), the ability to capture and summon monsters in battle, and a snow leopard as a best friend, why would you choose anyone else? H’aanit’s story begins with the hunt of a rampaging monster who has been killing people and (more importantly?) disrupting the ecosystem of the forest. Once that little introductory scenario plays out, you leave on a grand journey across the world to find H’aanit’s master.

The forest quest seemed fairly simple at first, as every encounter is one-on-one and you can usually just capture every monster to end fights quickly. But then I got to the boss and… it was a really rough battle! Balancing the need to break its guard with using your boost points at the right time was tricky, and I even needed to pop a couple healing items to survive. Who has ever heard of that? Having to heal at the first boss? Of course this all paled in comparison to the second boss I went up against, who wiped my party the first time around and forced me to use a bunch of revives (“olive of life” as they’re called here) to just barely claim victory on my second try. I get the feeling that Octopath Traveler won’t be pulling any punches!

Speaking of the battle system, it’s surprisingly awesome. Every monster has a little number representing their defense. When you hit them that many times with a weapon/element they’re susceptible to, their guard is broken and you get a free turn to wail on them for extra damage. If that sounds vaguely familiar, it’s because that’s basically how the battle system in Final Fantasy XIII worked. The main difference here is that you’re in complete control of your party, and not just telling them when to switch into a defensive stance or healing mode. Now I was one of those weirdos who greatly enjoyed FFXIII, so obviously when you take that and make it more engaging, it’s going to win me over big time. Plus you also get access to subclasses later on that lets you mix and match passive abilities like in Final Fantasy Tactics, which I am all about.

One thing I don’t really understand yet is the field abilities. Or, I should say, I don’t understand H’aanit’s field ability. Every character has one unique way to interact with NPC characters, and H’aanit has the ability to… have her monsters beat the crap out of people. Seriously. It makes you enter a battle with a common townsperson and then knock them out with your monster buddies. Ophelia the cleric can have people follow the party so you can summon them into battle to help out with random skills. But H’aanit just beats people up and takes their lunch money. I’m sure there’s a practical use for this skill, but I really have no idea what it is, and experimentation with it is making me feel bad.

So all that aside, I think the only problem I have with the game so far is that the mini-map is really just a radar. Like, it’s a foggy patch of black and grey with points of interest floating around in there all nebulously and whatnot. It’s not really a problem, because the maps aren’t especially complicated (yet), but the cartographer in me desperately wants to have a real map that fills in as I explore. And I don’t know, maybe one of the later characters will give me that ability. Or not, but I’mma keep my fingers crossed.

And so finally, I can proclaim that yes, after three hours, Octopath Traveler is 2018 GOTY.

Well, maybe not. But it is very good! And now that I’m done work for the day, I have the rest of the week off, and I fully intend to play Octopath until I pass out from exhaustion tonight. Or until I run into an ever harder boss and need to step back for a while to collect my thoughts and plan out a better strategy. Whichever one comes first. Either way I am pumped!

(It also really bugs me that they don’t spell “Traveler” with two Ls, but what can you do?)

Halfway mark to GOTY

You know, I’ve been keeping this data current, so I might as well post about it.

Currently, there are 19 video games that are eligible for the inevitable Top X Video Games Beaten in 2018 article (I don’t know how many spots I’m going to have this year). That number would be reduced to a paltry five if I only included games released in 2018.

Of those, I feel like three have guaranteed spots, and only one is an actual 2018 game.

The rest are six maybes, four that I’m kinda meh on, and six that are definite nos.

The moral of the story is that I’ve clearly been playing too many games that I don’t really like this year. I may have to do a reassessment of the list with a more forgiving heart. Keeping in mind that I immediately cut 32 of the 54 games eligible for 2017’s list, so the ratio of definite nos to total games is still a lot better this year (32% in 2018, 59% in 2017).

Remembering the Cottage: Part 2

Happy Canada Day! To celebrate, let’s go way back and take a look at something that was an integral part of Canada Day for me for many years. Yes, that’s right, it’s finally time for the long-awaited Remembering the Cottage: Part Two

I have been slowly writing this article since 2007, which is not the longest that I’ve ever procrastinated on writing something, but it is a concept so close to my heart, so important to the foundation of who I am, that I feel terrible for not having finished writing it at some point in the last eleven years. During that time, many details have certainly been forgotten and memories jumbled up, so this is definitely not going to be as historically accurate as it should be.

To help illustrate, in the time since I posted Part One: two generations of Nintendo consoles passed; Obama’s tenure as US President began and ended; smartphones replaced flip-phones and human-to-human contact; I purchased two homes; I met a girl who I dated, married and divorced; and I bumbled my way into a job that eventually led to what darn well better be my career at this point.

I don’t know how long this article is going to go on for, but if the previous part is anything to go by, it’ll be a whopper. You all know the story anyway, and if you don’t, maybe go check out Part One and then come back. So let’s just skip the formalities and head right in, yes?

Continue reading Remembering the Cottage: Part 2

Monthend Video Game Wrap-Up – June 2018

Yes, Monthend Roundup or whatever it’s called is being posted a day early. That’s because there’s a HUGE article coming out tomorrow, and it’s very important to me that it goes live on Canada Day. So that’s that. Why am I explaining this? You don’t care.

~ Game Over ~

Mega Man 8 (Switch) – I was never a huge fan of this one, and replaying it in 2018 only serves to remind me of how it just doesn’t measure up to the rest of the series.

Bloodstained: Curse of the Moon (Switch) – A truly immaculate homage to Castlevania 3. Maybe a little on the easy side, but at least it never feels impossibly difficult, like its inspiration.

Mega Man 5 (Switch) – Now this one, this game is way too easy. The one NES Mega Man that I can burn through without even considering a save state. But it’s still very charming and creative!

Mega Man (Switch) – I don’t especially like Mega Man One. Why are his feet so slippery? Why do those big stompy guys hurt so much? How do you beat Yellow Devil without cheating?

Shaq-Fu: A Legend Reborn (Switch) – I’ll just say this: I’m glad I got this for free.

~ Now Playing ~

Pokémon Quest (Switch) – It’s a grind. A never-ending and wholly unsatisfying grind. Luckily, you can just set it to auto and let it grind itself. I still wouldn’t recommend it. Grind.

Tales of Berseria (PS4) – I have no idea why Berseria isn’t jiving with me the way other Tales games have. Whenever I play, I get a strong urge to do anything else after about 10 minutes.

MGSV: The Phantom Pain (PC) – I have become obsessed with this game, and now whenever I see a cargo container, I instinctively want to attach a Fulton balloon to it to steal it away.

Fallout Shelter (Switch) – It reminds me a lot of Middle Manager of Justice, only more post-apocalyptic. I don’t know that I have room in my life for another “waiting” game, though.

Fran Bow (PC) – A horror-themed point-and-click adventure game about a sick little girl who abuses pills to hallucinate solutions to puzzles. Also she may or may not have killed her parents.

I Am Setsuna (Switch) – Picked this back up because I want to finish it before Octopath Traveler next month. Unfortunately, I was saved right before a ridiculously hard boss…

 

Top 6 surprises in Kirby Star Allies

Before Kirby Star Allies was released, I wasn’t sure if I was really going to buy it or not. Kirby has always been one of my favourite Nintendo mascots, but the last three main-series Kirby games have been basically the same game with a new gimmick and different sub-games. And honestly, you can say that about most of the series in general. But Star Allies’ big hook is that it is a multiplayer-focused game (very similar to Return to Dream Land), and me being more of a lone wolf, I didn’t see a ton of appeal there.

Obviously, I did end up buying the game in the end, because that’s what I do. And I turned out to be pleasantly surprised with the result! While the core gameplay remains faithful to what you’d expect from the Kirby series, HAL turned the formula on its ear just enough to make Star Allies feel like a fresh take on Kirby. So today, I want to take a quick look at five of the things that surprised me the most about Kirby Star Allies.

Continue reading Top 6 surprises in Kirby Star Allies

Nintendo @ E3 2018

This is it: the big collection of video game commercials that I’d been aching for since March. Okay, yeah, with that qualification, it’s obvious that I was 90% in it just for the Smash. But hey, there were other neat things, too! Let’s take a look at the sentence or two that I had to say about them!

Daemon X Machina – OOH ANIME MECHS. I LIKE. It’s like the best parts of Xenoblade X but made by Platinum and Suda51. (Except not. It’s actually Marvelous making it.)

Xenoblade 2 DLC – Speaking of Xenoblade… Hey it’s that promised story expansion DLC for the game that I’ve still only seen like 50% of. It’s a prequel with a new titan, I guess? I don’t know, the narration was Japanese and my phone was sitting on a stand that obscured the subtitles. Obviously I’m going in on it, because Xenoblade 2 is freakin’ sweet and yeah I’ll take any more of it that they’re willing to give me.

Pokémon Let’s Go – No new information here. Just Reggie pimping the lame Pokéball Plus accessory. But it does give you a free Mew, so…

Super Mario Party – I don’t have friends, so I don’t care. And even if I did, I’m sure they’d just dump all over it instead of playing with me. Dig the logo, though.

Fire Emblem: Three Houses – It’s Fire Emblem on Switch, which is so cool, which I’m down with. But I have played exactly one Fire Emblem game ever, and I have my doubts that I’ll be adding this one to the list any time soon.

Fortnite – Nope. Don’t care. I do like how not-gritty it is, though. And cool that it’s out NOW.

Overcooked 2 – I’ve heard many times that Overcooked is great, but again, with the lack of friends and all.

Killer Queen Black – Like, seriously. No friends. Okay, one friend. But that’s still not really enough to care about multiplayer party games.

Hollow Knight – Ah! A single-player game! There we go! But I’ve played it already, so… oh, what? It’s available today? And only $17? Hey, I mean, it’s not like I paid money to play it the first time…

Octopath Traveler – New demo with carry-over data… but I really don’t have time to fit that in at the moment. I don’t even know that I’ll be able to make time for the full game come July.

Sizzle reel – Mostly things shown at other presentations, or that are already out, or are getting DLC soon. Nothing that made me shriek with joy. Dark Souls still doesn’t have a release date, and Monster Hunter Generations Ultimate made an appearance. Hi, 5 seconds of Mega Man 11!

Super Smash Bros Ultimate – There was a lot to process here, so rather than trying to clean it up, here’s my stream-of-consciousness notes, hastily typed as I was watching: Oh Sakurai, you joker. Link has new moves!  Zelda is Link Between Worlds style!! (<3) Ice Climbers are back! Pokémon trainer! Lucas! Ryu! Ganondorf looks better than ever! Cloud! SNAKE IS BACK! Pichu! Toon Link AND Young Link! Wolf! MEGAMAN! Every fighter ever is back! This is amazing news!  BIG BLUUUUE! Daisy?? (Aw, dangit.) Inkling seems awesome, and I love the Squid Sisters assist trophy. But where’s Off The Hook? Bomberman assist trophy? Nice! Ooh and a deadly Fake Smash Ball! GOOD LORD RIDLEY MURDERED MARIO AND MEGA MAN.

Verdict: Super Smash Bros Ultimate is out on December 7 and that’s all that matters. Everything else was gravy at best, or I just didn’t care. Smash is all I wanted from this presentation. It’s all I wanted from this E3. And by God, they delivered!