(Monster) Hunting again

Every Sunday for the past few weeks, my youngest brother and I sit down and play Monster Hunter Freedom Unite until either Stephanie gets home from work or one of us gets tired of it. It’s been a great tradition so far and I hope it can continue for a long time to come. I’m a really big fan of both Monster Hunter and brotherly bonding time. I wouldn’t mind having a third (and fourth!) join the group, but neither of us know anyone else who plays. Sure there’s online play, but being in the same room really helps team coordination, and that’s a very important part of Monster Hunter.

Last weekend we took on the dreaded Ashen Lao-Shan Lung. Zac’s played through most of the game with random hunters online, but this is the first time I’d ever come face-to-snout with the gigantic elder dragon. Cedaeus and Jhen Moran from Monster Hunter Tri got me used to building-sized monsters, but it’s always thrilling when you meet a new one in combat for the first time. I’d seen Lao-Shan Lung artwork before, so I wasn’t surprised by his size, but when you run up to a creature that could swallow you whole, it’s exhilarating and terrifying at the same time.

The battle itself wasn’t terribly difficult. Lao progresses slowly from area 1 to 5. The plan was for me to keep whacking him in the face to break his horn since I was rocking a great sword, while Zac sliced away at the beast’s belly with his dual blades. Much to our surprise, the horn smashed almost immediately and I moved onto the belly. It was a little cramped down there (Lao creeps forward on all fours), so I ran back up to the head. It was pretty smooth sailing until we got to area 5. Lao’s feet and tail are the only things that can hit you until he gets to 5 and enters attack mode, and by focusing on the head I was far away from those danger spots most of the time.

During the march, I used up all my mini whetstones (I don’t think I’ve ever had to sharpen that much while using the Blue Claw Blade), and Zac managed to get on Lao’s back and ignite the Dragon Bomb. I figured that with such a huge amount of damage being done we’d surely fell the beast. But no, the fight ran out to the end and Lao retreated. It’s probably my fault because I spent a lot of time waiting for an opening to use the dragonator, and then proceeded to screw it up. Oops. But at least we completed the quest! Not that I’m really ready for 7-star quests, but whatever.

That said, I’m really dreading our next play session. The 7-star urgent quest is two tigrexes. I’m pretty sure I made very clear how much I hate tigrex. I can barely deal with one of the damn things. I’d rather fight Shen Gaoren and Lao-Shan Lung at the same time.

You can never have too many Quests

I spent about an hour on Sunday poring over the selection of indie titles available over Xbox Live. It’s not an uncommon pastime for me, though very rarely do I find anything worth its weight in Microsoft points. Officially I went in there looking for Wizorb (which is a story for another day), but DLC Quest managed to catch my attention and I gave it the ol’ trial download. In an exciting twist, I found it plenty enjoyable and put down my points for the full game.

Before I start, the most important thing to note here is that the trial version  of DLC Quest is roughly a third of the entire game’s content. Yeah, the full game is super-short; I completed it in less than half an hour. It only costs 80MSP though, which is roughly a little more than a dollar, and I feel that I’ve gotten more than my dollar’s worth out of the game.

DLC Quest is one big joke. It’s exactly the joke the title describes too; the game lampoons the video game industry’s current trend of selling you half of your game’s content separately from the game itself. Only you have to buy nearly all of this game via DLC (but the DLC is paid for with in-game currency, so it’s okay). At the beginning you character has no animation and can only move left. You’ll notice that there is no sound at all, and that you cannot pause. Each of these features must be bought as in-game DLC packs. Eventually you move on to other, more standard DLC items, like horse armor, a top hat, and a costume pack for the NPCs.

The basic gameplay consists of exploring the map and collecting coins with which you can buy the DLC packs you require to progress further. It’s kind of like a tiny little Metroidvania that plays out on two huge maps. You obtain a sword, but it’s really just a glorified hedge clipper. You can use it to whack the NPCs around, but the only thing you need it for is to remove bushes that block your way.

As I stated before, it took me less than half an hour to completely finish the game, and that includes collecting all the funky little in-game “awardments.” They’re the indie game stand-in for achievements, if you hadn’t guessed.

While the gameplay doesn’t give you anything new or really noteworthy, the important thing to note is that DLC Quest knows that it’s a big joke and plays to that as much as it can. The short conversations between the nameless hero and the NPC range from clever to snarky, and are almost always funny. There are even a couple little twists thrown in towards the end, and the final boss encounter will subvert all your expectations. The graphics are simple and charming, the way pixel graphics ought to be, and while the music isn’t exactly memorable, it’s enough to keep you bopping along for the short ride.

The thing I want to praise DLC Quest for most is it’s control scheme. Yes, it’s just running and jumping, but it’s running and jumping done right. I swear most of these indie platformer developers have no idea how a video game character should move. DLC Quest’s hero moves breezily along, whereas the heroes of most of the other indie platformers I’ve played (Endless Princess, Aurelia, Castle of Pixel Skulls, etc.) are either way too fast or move like they’re made of wood. Not that it’s a problem inherent to indie games mind you, as plenty of regular games suffer from awful controls. I guess the point is that if you character is going to be spending most of his/her time running and jumping, it’s not a bad idea for them to have the same feel as Mario.

Anyway, DLC Quest is a winner. If you’ve got half an hour to kill and 80 Microsoft points languishing in your account, there are worse ways to spend them.

Like a sieve

Back in November I was considering doing my “24 Days of Materialism” again this year (because it’s such a hit, you see). I had a rough draft of the items I was going to pitch and everything.

Clearly, I forgot.

It’s okay though! I have a backup plan! It’s not a very good one, but at least it’ll be something. So check back on December 24th to see what I’ve got cooking. And now for something completely different:

I spelled “forgot” wrong at first, and WordPress’ spellcheck suggested that I meant to type “faggot.” Why would it suggest that? Come on WordPress, have a little decorum. But that did remind me of a rather hilarious blog that I’ve been following since last week: Texts From Bennett. It’s sooo inappropriate but sooooo hilarious. It’s not often that I have a hard time containing my amusement while browsing the web. I definitely recommend against reading this at work because you’ll laugh real hard, then people will wonder why you’re laughing and come have a look, then you’ll get fired for looking at offensive material during work hours.

Cart way before the horse

So I was reading this interview with Shigeru Miyamoto, and at one point he mentions that he thinks that The Legend of Zelda would be a good franchise to have Retro Studios work on next. I don’t even know where to start on that one, but the frothing demand bird should be here any minute.

Yeah, I don’t really want to get into speculation on a new Zelda game before the last one’s been out even a month. Go read that interview.

Ice is nice

It should be pretty well known by now that I’m a big fan of Mike & Ike candies. There are a few little things that regular folk don’t know about them though. The average person knows the original flavours in the green box, and the Berry Blast variety in the blue box can almost always be found next to the originals. The Tropical Typhoon flavour (red box 1) is the best of the basic triad by leaps and bounds, but is significantly harder to find. These all come in the long, rectangular box in which the candies are loose. There is one flavour that comes in a slightly more squareish box, Tangy Twister. These are the worst. Not only do they taste bad, but there is a plastic pouch inside the box that holds the candies, resulting in considerably less candies than you’d find in the long box. There are some other flavours, like Red Rageous (the best), Jolly Joes, and Lemonade Blends. However, these flavours are either incredibly rare or not sold in Canada., because I’ve only ever seen Red Rageous when I drive down past the border.

Last week, we were down at the Forks Market, and while perusing one particular candy shop (I can’t be bothered to remember what it was called) I found these babies. While I was thrilled to find a flavour of Mike & Ikes that I’d never seen before, I was immediately suspicious of the squareish box. I bought it anyway because I like Mike & Ike.

Arriving back at home, I broke into the box with haste and discovered that it did indeed contain the plastic baggie of candies. Less candy than a standard box? That’s one strike against Italian Ice. Then I looked at the back to see what the flavours were… and they were all the same as the original Mike & Ikes, albeit swapping lime for watermelon. What was going on here?

I popped a few in my mouth, and at first it seemed like just the regular old flavours going on, and then it hit me. The Italian Ice candies produce a very strange taste sensation that I really have no idea how to describe. It’s sort of reminiscent of eating a freezie that tastes like Mike & Ikes, just without the cold. It’s totally weird, but wonderful in a way. I probably won’t buy them again because I’m never at the Forks and they cost like a dollar more there (plus you get less in this dumb box), but I liked them. If Walmart started selling them, I’d probably pick up a box every once in a while.

Real Ultimate Victory

Tigrex isn’t the biggest monster. Nor is he the last one you face. He’s not even on the cover of Monster Hunter Freedom: Unite (though to be fair he was on the cover of Monster Hunter Freedom 2). What he is, and forever will be, is my least favourite monster to hunt. Kushala Daora? Annoying, but not so bad. Lunastra? Way too strong, but not nearly as cheap. Tigrex? I hate you.

This is a photo of the first tigrex I was ever able to bring down. Probably my most hard-fought video game achievement ever. I might have lasted long enough to slay the bastard, but I didn’t want to take that chance. Tigrex can and will destroy you in a matter of seconds if you give him the opportunity. I just loathe the thought of having to face a buffed-up version of this guy once I get into the high-rank quests. Maybe I’ll have to consider this particular Monster Hunter experience complete one I’m done the low-ranks. Tigrex is the monster that makes Monster Hunter so hard that it’s not fun anymore. (And that’s saying a lot, because I find Monster Hunter to be super fun!)

What a twist!

Nearing the end of our ComicCon adventure, Stephanie was getting a little thirsty. We’d been there several hours and hadn’t stopped for sustenance since leaving home. We were about to head out to find a refreshment stand when I saw this baby at a kiosk.

It was surrounded by other, potentially much healthier foreign beverages, but I was determined to get me some foreign Pepsi. They were ridiculously expensive at $3.00 a can, but hey, at least it was something to write about. The Pepsi Twist was streets ahead of the terrible, terrible Pepsi Lime, but it still wasn’t great. It was more like drinking a 7up with a splash of Pepsi, rather than the other way around. Not bad, overall, but I certainly wouldn’t spend three more dollars on another can. A six-pack, maybe. I’m assuming it’s pretty much the same thing as the North American version of Pepsi Twist was, but I haven’t seen that stuff in forever, and don’t recall ever trying it back when it was available.

I can’t read a lick of this because my knowledge of the Japanese language is extremely limited, but I’m pretty sure it’s telling you that this stuff is going to kill you. That or it’ll give you a serious case of the diabetes. But then again, isn’t that the case for all soft drinks?

TE @ C4

It’s gotta be… weeks now since I went to Central Canadian Comic Con. It was cool, I must say. Though I guess I’m not as much of a nerd as I thought it was because it was (local) Nerd Mecca and I wasn’t super-psyched about it. Oh well. I took a few (blurry) pictures while I was there. Everything from Minecraft to papercraft, and even one ass that did not belong in that costume. Actually I took a few pictures of those, but I figured one is enough to prove my point and deleted the rest. Be thankful. There’s an alternate universe where this post is all pictures of asses that shouldn’t be seen by human eyes.