Give something new a try

So I sat down today and wrote out an article. I’ve been meaning to do it for about two months now, but that’s by no stetch the longest I’ve ever had an article waiting to be written. I still have a lot in the backlog, and I guess I should do some soon, because I think they might be breeding.

I also updated the CD collection on Friday, but never got around to making the news post to announce it. I also couldn’t get the CSS to work right for the updated page links, so you’ll have to consult the “last update” callout to see what’s what. I guess I could tell you here, but I feel like being an ass and leaving it up to you.

I have a feeling September might be a little slower than the last couple months have been. I’m going through my “I don’t even want to think about the internet” phase right now, so we’ll see what happens.

Ooh, and I rented Clock Tower 3. Wow. I definitely should have played it before Haunting Ground, that’s all I’ve got to say. Though I might never have given Haunting Ground a chance if I’d played CT3 first. Who knows? Either way, I recommend both for the high levels of cheezy horror. You might just want to watch someone play CT3 though. It’s not so good when you’re actually playing it.

No time to talk

Ugh. So as kind of expected, I blew the driving test. Not too badly, though, and I should be able to pass easily next time. When that next time is going to happen, I have no idea. Given my penchant for procrastinating, probably not too soon. I also had a job interview yesterday, which was sweet. I doubt I’m going to get hired, but it was nice to at least get an interview. Those are rare.

I don’t have much in the way of links today, but I suggest checking out The Top Eleven Best Arch-Nemeses

I said I’d talk about StarFox Command on the off chance that I bought it, and quite frankly, I seem to have a problem saying no to StarFox. That’s not such a bad thing though. Command is almost as good as StarFox 64, even though it deviates from the formula quite a bit. All the flying is done in free-range areas, maning no on-rails levels. A shame, because I love those kind of levels, but I’m not going to complain. The things that do put me off are A)you’re always on a timer, and B) there’s very little variety as far as objectives go. Either you’re hunting down a specific enemy type, or you’re going up against a boss. The formula could use a little more, but it’s still fun.

The new thing in this game is that for each stage, you actually have a tactical map to move your Arwings through, collecting items, encountering enemies, and liberating bases along the way. It sounded dumb in previews, but I actually really like how it works out. You even get to control all your pilots (who switch in and out during the story) independently, and each one has a unique ship and theme music. It all works out really well, and I most definitely suggest you pick this one up if you have a DS. I haven’t even gotten around to playing mulitplayer yet, and I think that says a good amount about how good the single-player game is.

Just to watch it burn

Busy week here in Ryan Land. Tomorrow is what I like to call D-Day (as in Driving Test Day). I don’t know how well that’ll go, but here’s hoping it won’t get too ugly. I’m pretty confident, but it’s mostly false confidence. Which I’m told is a character flaw. But is it really false confidence if I know it’s false? The perplexity of it all makes my head hurt.

I also have to head back to the dentist on Thursday so that he can fuck around some more in my facehole. Getting a filling isn’t nearly as bad as some have made it out to be, but I could most certainly be doing more enjoyable things with my morning.

Nextly, it’s a pretty big week for Coozy For Hire. Along with the regularly scheduled comic on Thursday, we’ve got our 1st year celebration on Friday, which will come with a free bonus comic. And to top it off, the second episode of Spare! hits on Saturday, so you’re going to be getting three comic days in a row. Just nuts I tell you. Fortunately, I had most of them done early (though now my buffer is totally used up and I have to start drawing again). Not to mention, our traffic is steadily increasing every month, and that’s very reassuring. I imagined that this little project would flop long before the year mark. I even have some juicy tidbits for you: firstly, the comics up until at least the second week of October are gold. Secondly, I’m working on a new feature, but I’m not sure if it’s going to work out. It’s for a very minor audience anyway, so I doubt it’ll matter in the end.

StarFox Command hit yesterday, and I want it, but I’m a little wary. The whole “command the missons” junk is a little off-putting, but I think WiFi dogfights would easily make it worth buying even if single player is a miss. I’ll make sure to log my thoughts about it if I do decide to pick it up.

Keep an eye on RainbowPuke.com. I recently submitted a piece. It’ll likely appear once a third page is posted, and you’ll likely be able to tell it’s mine. Cause it has my name on it.

Due to my recent CD acquisitions, I will have to update at least one page in the CD Collection. I’ll also be adding a new page by the end of the week. Not many short ones left, either. B, Q, and S in particular are ones I’m not at all looking forward to doing.

After all this, I think it’s pretty much understood that I’m not going to be doing much on the article front this week.

Look at the hottie in the tight jeans

I watched The Bechwarmers the other night. It was surprisingly good. I mean, it’s not something I would buy, but I’ll recommend renting it. Dick and fart jokes, plenty of slapstick, and mucho vomit. Exactly what I look for in a dumb movie. Plus a bunch of good names. I’m not a huge Rob Schneider fan, but he, David Spade and Jon Heder do a commendable job on this one.

Bought me a buttload of CDs over the last couple days. Four, actually, but I defy you to load your butt with more than four CDs. Bad Religion’s The Empire Strikes First is fan-frickin-tastic, and Thrice’s Red Sky EP headbutts women in the ovaries for fun. The other two (Resident Evil Soundtrack, OK Go’s Oh No) are less notable, but I like them enough to have bought them. I also finally found a copy of The Alpahbet of Manliness. Needless to say, it’s the best book I’ve read since… Well, probably ever.

Lastly for today, I will wipe any doubt that I don’t kick major ass from your mind. Behold:

click for king-size

Frankly, “Bark At The Moon” was a bitch, but otherwise, I think I’m getting pretty good. I’m not going anywhere near Expert mode though. Not until I five-star everything on Hard, at least. It literally frightens me.

What’s the matter with you?

Stumbled onto a sizeabe deposit of twenty-spots earlier today. One almost large enough to fund an XBox 360. But there are far more important uses for those twenties, so Dead Rising will have to wait.

In other news, my brother showed me the greatest candies ever; Ice Breakers Sours.

There totally isn’t enough to talk about here to write a whole article, so I’m gonna constrain it to the blog. The thesis here is that these are friggin’ awesome candies. While they go under the guise of mints, I’m going to be referring to these as candies, beacuse quite frankly, they have all the properties of candy, and very few semblances to mints.

Let’s get the obvious bit over with, they taste awesome. Coming in either “berry” or “fruit” varieties, Ice Breakers Sours taste like scoring with your friend’s hot sister. So awesome. They’re called sour, and I’m not a big fan of sour, but they’re not so bad. The whole sour bit lasts about four seconds, and you’re just left with sweet candy taste. The first time I ate one, the sour hit me hard, then faded away into the delicious berry taste that I could only describe as “happiness.”

They’re got a pretty good texture to them, being shaped and smooth like Sweet Tarts. They’re about as hard as Sweet Tarts too, but they crumble very nicely once you bite into them.

Ice Breakers Sours are officially regarded as mints, but they certianly don’t act like mints. Yes, their strong flavour will linger in your mouth for a while, but it doesn’t last long enough to be put to any serious breath-freshening use. They cost a pretty penny, though, which is common for top-tier mints, like these and Altoids. It’s damned hard to resist eating them like candy too. You know, the whole delicious thing playing a part there.

Overall, I stand firmly behind my opinion that Ice Breakers Sours rule. One might even say they’re crumbelievable.

And this bird you cannot change

Time for a quick BotM here. This month, I’d like to pay some tribute to the greatest cover artist ever: Richard Cheese. And he’s not your regular cover artist either, he redoes all sorts of popular songs lounge style, and it’s usually a pretty sweet result. Some particular favourites include Van Halen’s “Hot for Teacher” and Sublime’s “Smoke Two Joints”. One thing that really makes him awesome is that when remixed as lounge songs, a lot of the tracks he chooses end up sounding absolutely hilarious. Take Disturbed’s “Down With The Sickness.” Not even the Vandals have any songs that make me laugh that much, and I’m pretty surre that’s what they’re out to do.

so yes, Richard Cheese = awesome lounge remixes. Check him out if you haven’t yet (I’ve already preached this to many of my friends), as I’m pretty sure it’s a kind of music that anyone can enjoy. End.

Dreaming I was Al Capone

I spent the day at the beach today. Bad idea. The beach is fucking torture for me. On the plus side, I got to watch a couple hot girls play tennis for an hour (boing boing). I also finally got a tiny litle sunburn. I say “finally” because I’ve spent a good chunk of time this summer just basting under the sun, and I hadn’t burned at all. I’m pretty much immune.

As far as the site goes, my productivity here is probably going to go down the crapper. I’ve doubled my workload over at Coozy For Hire by deciding to publish two comics a week, and basically what that means is I’m going to be double annoyed by having to write articles. I’ve still got a handful on the back burner that I’ve been putting off for months now, so maybe I’ll get one or two of those up in the coming weeks. Or maybe the ramped-up comic production will push article production even further down my priority list.

Now, I’m not just putting out a second CFH strip each week, either. On every Saturday, I’ll be drudging up a comic from days past, drawing (pun!) from my gigantic collection of comics written about my high school shenanigans. The art quality will be a little less than I shoot for when I do a CFH strip, but considering the source material’s quality, it still looks about 100x better. I think that’s about everything I needed to go through today, so I’ll be off now.

Never turn your back on it

Yep. I know I didn’t post an article last week. And so the streak ends. It was a good run though. Anyhow, I’ve been at the cottage for the last four days, and damn did I get a lot accomplished. Most importantly, I learned to bake pie. This is probably going to end up a bad thing though, because now I can create pie whenever I want, and it’ll likely be my downfall. Secondly, I finished Kingdom Hearts 2 with a 100% completion rate. It was a bitch, but I did it. I’m proud of myself. And the game was pretty awesome too. A little easy due to Forms being totally broken, but fun no less. So now, links!

The Top Ten Unmanliest Superheroes

Your Band Name Sucks: 50 of the Inexcusably Worst

The truthiness about bears

My new favourite video ever (NSFW)

This is a little entertaining. Kinda.

IGN Wii’s Retro Remix takes a look at Earthbound

That was a beaut

Remember when I went nuts over the prospect of Biker Mice From Mars on DS? Trailer! While it certainly looks like it could be good, they really need to inject some, oh, I dunno, action into it. Not a whole lot going on there.

Help name a bridge after Stephen Colbert! We’re still a long way off, so go get voting, you dummy.

Best internet mashup video ever. Even better than all those Zidane headbutt collections. There must be dancing!

I know I’m really late on this one, but if you haven’t seen the PS3 vs. Wii vid yet, hurry up. Hot chicks in boy shorts are always excellent promotional tools.

After just over a week of being under repair (felt like forever though), Tyler’s back!

I finally got my hands on Remastered Tracks Rockman Zero 4: Physis. I heartily approve! Even the drama tracks (which are diaogue explaining the story, and entirely in Japanese) are pretty cool. Sample, anyone? (right-click, save as)