Mass Review Time – Fargo ’08

 

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It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these mass review articles (usually they’re just blogged). More importantly, it’s been a while since I’ve done an article at all. Much to my own dismay, a cheap mass review is not way to worm my way back into the game, but it’s all I’ve really got the gumption to work on at the moment. It’s not that I don’t want to write articles anymore, it’s just that there are so many other things I want to do more. And even more things I need to be doing.

But I digress. Blabbing about why I’m no longer writing full-length pieces is not today’s topic! But rather I’m here to discuss money well spent? I decided to end that sentence with a question mark because at this point I still can’t gauge the actual quality of most of the products below. I just bought most of them through good word-of-mouth and personal tastes. In fact, I’m pretty sure that at least a couple would be considered complete garbage by the general population, but we’ll see!

So the bonus theme here is that I picked up all this stuff when my girlfriend and I went away to Fargo(, North Dakota) for the weekend. I did a little photo gallery with commentary of last year’s trip south of the border (see sidebar), so maybe you’ll prefer that one if you’re looking for an article with a little more meat on its bones. Also, certainty. This here article, as of this writing, is pretty much all assumptions. It’s built on the hopes and dreams of millions! …Or maybe just me.

• Item #1

Tesla – Five Man Acoustical Jam

Okay, I know said it was all assumptions from here on in, but I’m starting with something I know is awesome: Tesla. I’ve been listening to Tesla for many, many years now, and sadly, I’ve only ever been able to find one of their CDs in any local stores. Thus, I often take it upon myself to scour the multimedia-type shops south of the border for anything I can find by them. This time I got real lucky, finding the two Tesla discs I was really gunning for. Five Man Acoustical Jam is obviously enough, a recording of a live acoustic show. It’s one of very few Tesla albums that I haven’t downloaded, so jackpot!

In other news, it’s completely awesome. Tesla is a great band, and they made their name through their acoustic prowess, so the only logical conclusion is that this album must rule. And rule it does. Don’t know what else there is to say other than I love it. Score: A

• Item #2

Tesla – The Great Radio Controversy

I know it seems silly that I only bought two Tesla CDs while I was down there, and now that I really think about it, I probably am really silly for it. I mean, I probably could have completed the full discography, but I stopped looking after I picked up these two.

Unlike its lovably live cousin above, The Great Radio Controversy is a studio album, but that means little. The Tesla-loving community largely believes this to be their finest work, and I’m not one to argue. It’s everything that makes Tesla great (minus the “awesome live performers” bit), and while it may not rock quite as hard as Psychotic Supper, it rocks just as well or better. Two thumbs up. Score: A

• Item #3

Mega Man Star Force 2

Yeah, I know you’re groaning right now and about to skip this paragraph, but that’s quite alright. You put up with more than enough of my Mega Man nonsense that you deserve a break from it if you can find one here or there. So go ahead and move on to the next item if you’ve gotten sick of hearing me rave about Mega Man.

For those that care, Star Force is the dual-screened big brother to the MegaMan Battle Network games. It seems like it’ll be following the same “new chapter every summer” release schedule that Battle Network had. I played the first one almost to completion last summer (I didn’t beat the final optional boss), and I was surprised to see this one in stores because honestly, I had no idea it was out. so I picked it up, and I’ve got to say, it’s most certainly not as big a step up from the first as Battle Network 2 was to its predecessor. I mean, I’m enjoying the game, but it hasn’t offered anything that improves on the first game. Well, not enough to make it feel exciting and new anyway. Score: C+

• Item #4

Etrian Odyssey 2: Heroes of Lagaard

As soon as I’d finally stopped flip-flopping on whether I wanted the first Etrian Odyssey or not, it had long since become impossible to find at retail. I was afraid EO2 would see a similar fate (despite being a new release), but after searching each and every store that sells video games in Fargo, I gave up and checked GameStop. As much as I generally loathe the GameStop/EB chain, it has to be said that they do actually carry Atlus games, and as a fan of Atlus’ niche titles, that scores some decent points in my book.

Anyway, I haven’t actually had a chance to plug it in and start playing yet (probably because I’m awasting all sorts of time writing about shit I buy), but I’ve read more than enough on the subject to be more or less familiar with what I’m getting into. The Youngest One bought it too (before I had a chance to advise him otherwise), probably because he thought “Ooh, an RPG. I should buy it”, and promptly got his ass whupped and put it right down. I doubt he’ll be spending too much time on this one, but someday when I’m in the middle of fewer games, I’ll crack this one open and spend a little quality time with it.

Edit : Decided I’d just forego finishing some other games so I could sink my teeth into this one. I’m not regretting it. Etrian Odyssey II is even better than I’d imagined. This is a real horror game, because you’re always on the edge of your seat, wondering if you’ll be able to survive the next fight. Also, even the slightest progress feels like you’ve made a huge accomplishment, so yeah. props to that. Love it. Score: A

• Item #5

Day of the Dead

No, it’s not Romero’s classic with a new cover. It’s one of those horrid “re-imaginings”, or so I assume. At least on the back cover it said it’s inspired by Romero’s Day of the Dead, so we can hope it at least pays a little homage to the original. In any case, it’s a zombie movie, so it most definitely belongs in my collection.

I should let you know that I fully expect this to be completely awful. That’s how these movies are. The characters are stupid and unlikable, the plot makes little to no sense and there’s buckets and buckets of gore. Yeah it sounds like a disaster, but that’s exactly what I’m looking for. I enjoy a good zombie movie, but I love a zombie movie that makes you want to root for the zombies. It’s brainless (in a manner of speaking) fun, and that’s really what I want in movies. So despite the fact that it’s defacing a classic, I have high-ish hopes for this one.

Edit : Yeah. So I watched it, and it’s not so great. It has almost nothing in common with the original, though if you concentrate real hard you can find a couple loose parallels between the two. But yeah, it’s not even a fun gore-fest. Just low-grade zombie schlock. When Nick Cannon is the best part of a movie, you know that you’ve got a bit of a train wreck on your hands. I’m a little let down by this one, honestly. Score: D+

• Item #6

The Dead Pit

As I was perusing the horror section at Fargo’s Best Buy (why doesn’t our Best Buy sort movies by genre? It’s so much easier…), and I saw that Day of the Dead remake thing, and then right beside it, The Dead Pit caught my eye. The cover didn’t really get the idea of zombies across to me, but reading the synopsis on the back confirmed my suspicions: zombies!

Much to my delight, this is one of those 80’s zombie flicks that pretends to have a cohesive plot. By that of course, I mean it’s more than “OMG zombiez. Let’s try to survive!” Something about a mad scientist attacking a mental ward with a horde of zombies? I dunno and I’m too lazy to go check the case, but it sounded like a riot at the time. I honestly think this could be as unpredictably lovable as Hellraiser. Score: B (pending)

• Item #7

Chucky: The Killer DVD Collection

I’ll level with ya, I’ve only ever seen the first Child’s Play movie, and even then, I was still a little squeamish at the time and covered my eyes a lot. I did like the movie though, and I’ve always wanted to at least see the first two sequels. Bride of Chucky isn’t exactly a priority, and Seed of Chucky seems like they’re just taking it too far. Alas.

I’ve been putting off buying this collection for a while now because I knew that not having the first one would drive me bonkers (OCD, you see), but it actually hasn’t been grating on my nerves too much. It’s not like the movie isn’t on DVD or anything either, I just can’t find the damn thing anywhere. Oh well. I’m sure some day I’ll be in the right place at the right time, and it will be mine. Or I’ll have forgotten my wallet and smack myself in the forehead. Score: B+ (pending)

• Item #8

Bruce and Lloyd: Out of Control

I’ll say this now, because it’s the most important note here: I was promised a lot more Patrick Warburton than I got from this purchase, and it makes me ever so slightly disappointed. Other than that, good times!

If you haven’t seen Get Smart yet, you’re really missing out on something. I loved it so much, I ran out an bought this straight-to-DVD supplemental material without even reading a review first. Fortunately, it’s not nearly as awful as most straight-to-DVD stuff, but it’s still nowhere near as great as the main movie. Then again, I never expected it to be. I’m just confused as to why exactly Steve Carell couldn’t make at least a cameo. Anne Hathaway shows up in one scene, so why do we get no Steve Carell? Ah well. If Get Smart was at the “hilarious” level, I’d probably only rate this one as “silly” at best, but it’s still worth a look if you liked the source material. Score: B

Also, I should mention that I bought some other stuff, like shorts and foodstuffs, but I decided to cut them out because clothes are boring (do not tell my girlfriend I said that, she bought clothes almost exclusively) and junk food isn’t something that really needs to be logged into the annals of internet history. At least, not any of the food I bought. It was all pretty much run-of-the-mill junk food that a) isn’t available in Canada or b) is ridiculously expensive in Canada. So yeah. That’s the end then. Good night.

Movie nights

Among the various things we do together, the woman and I have taken to going out (at least) every Tuesday night to see a movie. So in the last month and a half, I’ve had more visits to the theater than I generally would over the span of a year. Unfortunately, they can’t all be as fantastic as Iron Man, but here’s a quick rundown of some of the flicks I’ve gone to see lately.

Sex and the City : The most recent movie outing was obviously entirely by her choice. I’ve only ever watched the show because we were watching TV one night and she decided that that’s what we’d be watching. Anyway, I cannot say I detested the movie. It was not something I enjoyed either, being two and a half hours of clothes and girl talk, but there were just enough legitimately funny moments that I wasn’t overly compelled to kill myself just to make it end. I shouldn’t have to tell guys to stay away from this one, but not falling asleep and pretending it wasn’t so bad will make your woman happy.

The Strangers : I was totally psyched to see this one. I love scary movies, and even the trailer had me creeped out. It actually did deliver on that promise of scariness, too. The creepy mask people were in fact creepy as all Hell, appearing out of nowhere and then sliently fading back into the shadows. I still get the jibblies when I’m in the dark and that damn sack mask enters my mind. The horror aspect of the movie was great and worth seeing it for, but otherwise, there wasn’t much. The plot was really bare-bones, and nothing really happened. It’s like the horror version of Open Water; a drawn-out dramatization of a true story.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull : I thought it was great, no surprise there. I’ve actually only ever seen Raiders of the Lost Ark, but I’m pretty sure that this movie lives up pretty well to the original Indiana Jones trilogy (well, that’s what I hear). It’s was plenty of fun, and I quite enjoyed even the scenes that some claim may have been a bit over-the-top. My only qualm with the movie is that it was all about aliens. Had we heard a bit more about whatever (assumed) Area 51 goodies they found in the opening scene, I may have been more at ease with it, but as it stands that scene was totally unrelated and mostly served just to introduce the villain. But I wasn’t even too annoyed by Shia Labeouf, and I can’t stand that guy, so we’ll call it a pretty huge success.

Made of Honor : Again, not my choice. But to my surprise, it was totally bearable! In fact, I might even risk my right to be called a man by saying I maybe even enjoyed it a little. Throughout the movie, I couldn’t help but think of how much Patrick Dempsey’s character reminded me of Robert Downey Jr’s Tony Stark. In any case, the “comedy” portion of romantic comedy was the one that was emphasized in this movie, and it also helps that the story revolved around the male lead character and not the female. I’d say that if you’re stuck seeing a chick flick, this is probably as good as you’re going to get.

What Happens in Vegas : We saw this one on a whim because we were late for Made of Honor that day, but it turned out really well. It stars Ashton Kutcher and Cameron Diaz, so you’re not going to be getting a strong story or intelligent humour, but I’ll admit that I did like this one. Pretentious assholes who are too self-involved to enjoy the everyman’s comedy won’t get anything from it, but if you see the humour in fart jokes and the like, then you’re in for a pretty good time.

88 Minutes : I’m not one for the crime drama genre, or whatever it is that this one falls under, but I guess it was good? I was supremely bored with Michael Clayton, but 88 Minutes managed to hold my attention for the duration of the movie, so that’s something. Maybe. I guess. I really don’t know what else to say. I haven’t talked to anyone else who’s seen it, or read any reviews or anything, so I don’t really have anything to go on. In conclusion, I enjoyed it, and the woman enjoyed it, so nobody’s complaining. Do I actually need to say somethign about the movies when I do these short little one-paragraph reviews?

So I won’t miss you

Edwin had informed me that in the previous post I had made a typo and dated it the 32nd of February. He then joked that the shortest month had suddenly become the longest. It’s funny though, that February has been abolutely crawling by for me. Don’t know why, but rather than obsessively checking the time to make sure I wasn’t wasting any, I’ve been pressed to find ways to while away my free time. I don’t know if March will put time back in its normal paces, but here’s hoping.

In other news, I watched The Omega Man whilst unable to sleep a couple mornings ago, and despite many, many parallels, it’s very different from the most recent revisioning of the story, I Am Legend. For most of the first half of the movie, you’ll notice all sorts of similarities between the two, having Neville blazing through town in a red car in the opening scene being the most obvious. Even scenes that are completely different, like where he’s reciting lines along with a movie (Woodstock and Shrek, respectively), had me thinking “Hey this is just like in the other one!”.

I think that despite the fact that the movies branch out in very different ways in the middle, I Am Legend is probably the better film overall, but The Omega Man has that wonderful 70’s vibe that I cannot help but love. The one part where I think The Omega Man excels over its newer counterpart would be the scenes where Neville has his shirt off. Charlton Heston’s physique isn’t going to make the common man look inadequate in front of his female peers, unlike Will Smith’s, who they will seriously not shut up about. I mean, come on girls, it’s Hollywood. You can’t possibly expect that kind of rippedness from Average Joe! So stop gushing about the scene where Will Smith is not wearing a shirt, please. If you have to, you can at least have the courtesy to do it while I’m not around. Jeez.

So yeah. I got a semi-review and two complaints out in one blog post. I think that’s pretty good. I guess it’s back to killing time for me then. I’m sure there’s probably something productive I could be doing.

Morning-after blues

Yesterday was pretty cool. Went and saw Cloverfield, which maybe didn’t quite live up to the hype, but I still enjoyed it. Also learned the basics of how to drive stick, so I won’t be fudged if the time comes where it’s do or die and that’s the skill that decides my fate. Quite possibly best of all, I ate three double quarter pounders for lunch. Mmmm I loves me some burger. But despite all the good things, I can’t help but have an unshakable uneasiness in the pit of my stomach (which is not beef-related). See, yesterday evening I got peer-pressured into applying for a promotion.

The reason I say “peer-pressured” is because I have a dangerously low level of self-confidence, especially when it comes to things like this. If I hadn’t been bombarded by co-workers telling me that I had to go for this stupid position from the moment I walked in to the moment I submitted my letter, I really doubt I would have gone through with it. They say you’ll never win if you don’t try, but I find the popular theory “trying is the first step to failure” is much more applicable to my life.

Yes, it’s supposed to be a good thing, and by all means, it should work out. I feel that I’m more than qualified for the position, but in the situation that I don’t get it, my very fragile emotional structure will be completely shattered and what little faith I have in myself and my abilities will disappear completely. Oh well. It’ll be wicked if I do get it, because the opening is in either one of two areas, and either way I win. If it’s in outdoors, that’s where I already work and I know pretty much everything there is to know, and I’ll be doing essentially the same thing I’m doing now for more money and with a shiny badge. If it’s in the boys area, I know the subject matter in there pretty well too, plus some other perks that I’m more inclined to keep to myself. So here’s hoping things pan out. If not, well, I suppose I’ll just have to go find a new jorb.

Remembering the Cottage: Part 1

My fondest memories can more or less be summed up in three categories: “Shopping at Toys ‘R’ Us”, “Holidays/Trips”, and “The Cottage”. The first two categories can still potentially be added to, but sadly, the third is now sealed away as only memories.

I’ve mentioned many a time on this website (most often in the blog) my many visits to my grandparents’ house, which just happened to be a sweet cottage out on the Winnipeg River. The thing is, I never described many events in detail, or took any pictures while I was out there. to nearly everyone, this mysterious cottage could have just as well been a well-constructed myth. To me though, it was very real, and it was the essence of my summers. I spent at least two weeks out there during the summer months for as long as I can remember, and there were quite often other trips out there for such events as Spring Break, Christmas, Thanksgiving, family reunions, long weekends, and many more. It was a great place, and while I may not have appreciated it quite as much in my older years, it was still a place I loved being very much.

Imagine my heartbreak when I first heard that my grandparents were thinking about selling. As if enough bad mojo wasn’t surrounding me in the year 2007, but now my beloved cottage was going to be taken away? Yeah, it sucks balls. The place was actually sold right at the end of August, and on my last weekend out there, I decided I would take a few pictures so I could put them on a webpage laced with wonderful stories of the time I’d spent there. This is that page, and it’s definitely more for my own sake than for anyone else to read, but feel free to sift through it. There are a lot of memories and strong emotions here, so don’t expect even an attempt at humour.


The TV Room

Overview: Ah, the TV room. I probably spent more hours here than anywhere else, but there are a couple catches that help to make that seem less like I was glued to the TV for all the time I was at the cottage. The most obvious one would be that for a couple years I used one of the couches as my bed, so that racks up the hours pretty quickly. If I regret anything in my lifetime, it’s that I didn’t spend nearly enough time out on the balcony that extends from this room. Don’t know why, but it just never seemed like the place I should be hanging out.

Atari: I guess the earliest thing I can remember this room for is that it’s where we had out Atari. Long before I got hooked on video games, my dad left his Atari system out here, only to be dug up many years later so he could show me the kind of games that were around before the NES. I spent many many hours playing Kangaroo, Pitfall, and Pac-Man. Even back when I was only but a wee lad, I could recognize that ET was the worst game ever made. The biggest mystery about the whole thing though, was that we had a manual for Donkey Kong, but there was nary a cartridge to go with it. Oh, how I burned to play Donkey Kong.

Simpsons & Bonding time: My younger cousin would often come in to visit at the same time we did in the summers, and it worked out well because he’s very much like me, so myself and The Youngest One would often spend a lot of time hanging out in here with him and playing whatever handheld game was in at the time. Or just whatever the most recent Pokémon game was. Those two are even more into Pokémon than I am, and I would always get into it when we came out to the cottage, because the young ones just wouldn’t shut up about it, and that would drag me into it. The Tall One and I were also deeply entrenched in the MegaMan Battle Network series, and it was pretty much a summertime tradition to buy the games just before we went out the cottage and simply play the Hell out of them while we were there. Both series of games brought me not only the regular pleasure of playing video games, but also a lot of valuable bonding time with my brothers and cousin. Sure, I can still play with them at home, but it’s just not the same. Also, my grandparents got satellite TV a few years back, and it seemed like that on any given evening that we were there, the Simpsons would always be on at least one channel, so we generally always had that on in the background. Good times, they were. Good times.

Movie night: Back in the day, my grandpa would often borrow a bunch of movies from a neighbour so we had something to watch while we were out there (this was before the satellite, and we were restricted to like three fuzzy channels). This is notable because it’s the first place I ever saw Kindergarten Cop, which remains my favourite Schwarzenegger film, and is near the top of my overall favourites. Many other times, while my grandparents were staying in the city, my family would come out for the weekend and basically binge on junk food and watch movies. Most of them were stinkers like RV and Epic Movie (to name some of the most recent), but it was still cherished time spent with my family and many, many cookies.

Random thoughts: It was a great place to hang out, and of course we often brought more in the way of video games than handhelds, as Atari was fun, but never quite enough. We fought over which console we would bring each time almost as much as we fought over who got to sit in that big reclining chair you can see in the second picture. I played a lot of Donkey Kong 64 out here, and that particular week at the cottage remains one of the most memorable for many reasons. I’ll always carry in my heart the memories of the first time I caught all the legendary birds in Pokémon Blue, as they were all while I was out at the cottage. I spent many subsequent trips out there playing through the game again and again, always reliving my triumphs over Zapdos, Articuno and Moltres with a smile on my face, often in the middle of the night when I should have been long asleep.


Guest Bedrooms

Overview: Only one is pictures, but there were actually two bedrooms upstairs. While I suppose they weren’t technically guest bedrooms, nobody used them but guests, so there you have it. Until the shed outside was turned into a mini-cottage of sorts (more on that later), we would often sleep in these rooms. For a handful of years I slept in the TV Room, as I mentioned before, but these were where we stayed the majority of the time.

Bedtime: The room you see pictured is actually the final phase of that room’s series of redecorations. Initially it had two huge beds lined against the window wall and the wall opposite the shelving. And when I say huge, I mean huge enough to play underneath with plenty of room to spare. I guess they were more high up than anything else, but while they were in there, I was still small enough to think they were gigantic. Until The Youngest One was born, the older two and I would sleep in this room together, a crib or mattress was placed in the empty floor when needed, and I moved onto the second bedroom room when The Youngest One came along and three beds weren’t enough to satisfy the four of us. But until that time, we spent many nights staying up “late” (back when 10:30 was late) and telling stories and jokes in the dark. Being all boys, there was plenty of roughhousing after bedtime too, and I really miss those times.

Bedtime 2: Eventually, when I moved onto the second upstairs bedroom, I was on my own and free to do whatever I pleased instead of sleeping. Obviously, I used that time alone to play GameBoy, listen to music, and read (most memorably the Final Fantasy VIII strategy guide, because that was another completely kickass summer) all through the night. Once the boys started sleeping outside (in the aforementioned shed) I took over the original room for myself again, and at that point it had been rearranged into the room you see in the picture above.

Comics: You can see the shelving in the picture, but hidden behind the pile of assorted sheets and whatnot is a huge collection of comics. They consisted mostly of Archie, Alf, Heathcliff, and Richie Rich. While those aren’t exactly my first choices in comics nowadays, I was pleased as punch to spend countless afternoons leafing through them. And though it took me a couple years to get the job done, I did eventually read through them all. Taking note of my love of comics, my grandpa started saving me the Sunday comics from the Free Press every week, and every time I went out to the cottage he’d always have a stack of funnies for me to peruse. He still saves them for me to this day, and I haven’t put any time aside to read through them for a while now, so I’ve got a rather large pile in my closet just waiting to be read or thrown out.

Horsin’ Around: Back when we were young, and the huge beds were still in the room, my brothers and I spent a lot of time playing in there, often concluding in someone being injured, however slightly. The number one game would be “Lava Monster”, which I know is not exclusive to us, because I’ve seen characters on TV playing it. But in case you have no idea, basically one person would be the Lava Monster and have to stay on the floor, and anyone else would be trying to stay on the beds while the Lava Monster tried to pull them down “into the lava”. The limited playfield may seem like an issue when I describe it, but it was more than enough when we were just lil’ guys. Plus, we’d always get any other visiting children to join in too, so sometimes the Lava Monsters would amount to more than one, depending on rules (either “Tag” or “Last Man Standing”).

Random Thoughts: Now that I think about it, I guess probably the thing I miss most about the cottage (and childhood in general) was playing with the older two of my brothers. While we still hang out and play video games together now and then, we don’t spend nearly as much time together as we did when we went to the cottage. Back when we were kids, we fought a lot (like, seriously, a lot) at home, but as soon as we got to the cottage, we were like best friends. It’s weird to say because I still see them every day, but I kinda miss my brothers. The Youngest One, I still find plenty of time to hang out with though, so at least I’ve got that. For now.


The Kitchen / Dining Room

Overview: Honestly, the living room, dining room, and kitchen are pretty much all the same room. But that’s hardly the point here. Being the glutton that I am, this area of the house holds just as many lovely memories for me as any other room. My grandma is a wonderful cook, and even the simplest dishes meant a lot, just because. I’ll certainly miss the couple weeks each year where I was guaranteed to have three square meals a day.

Breakfast time: Where to start? I suppose breakfast would be the obvious one. I’m not a big breakfast eater. I adore the meal, but very rarely to I have enough motivation or time to partake. The nice thing about the cottage is that breakfast was always a sure thing (with the exception of the later years where I would stay up too late and sleep right through breakfast time). Most of the time it would be a simple cereal/toast/fruit affair, but that was okay. My grandpa would always have the paper completely read by the time I got up, so when I was eating breakfast, he’d have the comics and puzzles pulled out and ready for me. Eating cereal is twice as awesome when you’ve got a crossword laid out for you and someone to chat with. On the best mornings, my grandma would make pancakes. Oh, those were mornings to really treasure. Until later on when grandma didn’t feel like making tons of them, my brothers and I would always compete to see who could scarf down the most. Good times were had by everyone, but our bellies were probably the happiest of all. Lazy mornings are probably my absolute most favourite thing in the world, and at the cottage, they were all that much better.

Lunch: I never looked quite as forward to lunch as much as I did breakfast, but I still like to revel in the nostalgia of noon-related meals. Most of all, would be when I was between eight and twelve or so, and we would often get the boat out and go fishing with my grandpa in the mornings. We’d always get bored pretty quickly and just resort to fooling around on the boat, but going home was a payoff in more than just getting back on dry land. My grandma would generally have lunch ready by that time, and it was awesome. Coming home to a big plate of sandwiches, veggies, cheese, cookies, and all sorts of etc was just superb after a long morning of fishing. Of course, lunch was great on other days, but those are the ones I remember the most. Looking back on this, I guess maybe it all sounds a bit mundane, but you really had to be there. Being pre-adolescent would help too.

Dinner: This is where grandma’s cooking really comes into play. You’re not going to do anything too fancy for lunch, but dinner is a different story. Grandpa often joked that he ate like a king whenever we were over, and I suppose maybe it’s not too far from the truth. I’m a notoriously picky eater, so I would often pick at some things, but most of the time I ate really well. Hams were especially common, and my family seems to be imbued with the power of making wicked awesome mashed potatoes. Going to the cottage on special occasions was great too, because that meant my grandma would make an extra huge and extra delicious dinner, which was always something to look forward to, even for one with as particular eating habits as me. In fact, I actually wrote about one particularly wonderful Easter dinner on the blog. Turns out it would be the last Easter diner we ever ate there….


Elsewhere…

Overview: While it’s true that being at the cottage was in itself the high point of going to the cottage, there were plenty of other cool places nearby to spend time. Most were great for adventuring while we were little, and some offered more than a simple thrill of an excursion into the unknown. All of them though, played a vital role in making trips to the cottage as memorable as the were.

Town: The cottage was about a five minute drive from the nearest town, Lac du Bonnet. I never cared too much for it while younger, but as I grew, I started to realize that it was more than just a grocery store and a beach. Annual Canada Day parades, while officially boring as Hell, would become an important family tradition, and the fireworks afterward only seem to get better each year. It was also home to the only dollar store where I’d ever seen the infamous Nintendo Surprise. It has since closed down and moved to a much larger building, and the goods within have become only slightly less magical. When Subway moved in, it was all we talked about for ages. The only chain restaurant that had been in the town until then was Chicken Chef, and that’s not the kind of place you just go on a whim. Nope, after Subway moved in, I don’t think there was one trip to the cottage where we didn’t partake.

Town 2: Pinawa is a little farther away, and we visited less often, but always for good reason. Firstly, I would like to mention that if it weren’t for my need to shop compulsively for various electronic media, this is exactly the kind of place I would like to live in. It’s small, but not tiny, and most if not all of the houses are quite nice. I’ve always entertained the thought of living in a small town, and Pinawa has always romanticized that idea. Anyhow, the main attraction here is The Burger Boat & Ice Cream Barge. It’s not the best ice cream place I’ve ever gone, but there’s something special about getting your ice cream from a boat. Always a special occasion, going to The Burger Boat was something to really get excited about. Seriously! On a boat! Turns out they even have their own web page. Neat!

The Boat Launch: A short hike away from the cottage, there’s a boat launch that I’ve never seen anyone use for boats. We’d go swimming or fishing off it, but never any boats. Probably because nearly everyone with a boat in the area has their own boat launch, but that’s besides the point. In any case, over the years, it became more of a point just for me to travel out to just to get some alone/thinking time. There were better spots for such things, but they were all farther away, and I’m lazy. The hike there was worth mentioning too, as there was always a bunch of stuff on the way. Mostly bodies of water to skip rocks in and bales of hay to climb on, but they meant a lot back in the day.

The Rocks: Along Tower Road was, that’s right, a tower. To this day I’m not sure exactly what kind of tower it was. Maybe a broadcasting tower of some sort? No idea, but that’s not what we ventured over there for. All around the mysterious tower were what seemed like endless miles of rocks perfectly fit for climbing. Heading out there at least once per summer, we’d make entire days of climbing around, searching for something, but not quite knowing what that something was. Maybe we were looking for anything at all? To me, it always seemed like the formations had changed, but I guess that’s dumb to say. I know they couldn’t have, but I guess my mental mapping skills weren’t entirely developed by then. We did, on occasion, find a small pile of rocks that signified that someone else had been wandering around there too, and we’d often set up our own little rock piles, with the intent of showing both other people and ourselves that we’d been there already. I haven’t been out there since I was about fifteen, and many times I’ve considered just making a trip out there to visit both Lac du Bonnet and Pinawa, and to spend the rest of the day climbing around on the rocks I so loved as a young’un. Maybe I’ll get around to it one of these summers.

More!: Yeah. There’s still more here. Hell, I could go on nearly forever with stories of my youth in any of these categories. It just so happens that the ones that take place outside sound infinitely less boring to everyone else. There were a lot of other places we’d head out to see what we could see, often against our wills. The Pinawa Dam was close enough that we didn’t mind going, but there still wasn’t much of interest. Point Du Bois was much farther away, and while it held a bunch of great memories for my grandparents and dad, there’s like nothing there that’s even remotely interesting to anyone who never lived/spent summers there. There were all sorts of other landmarks that my grandparents liked to take us to, like a big ol’ suspension bridge, and yet another dam. All were pretty boring and mosquito-filled, but in the end, I appreciate them taking us, because as lackluster as they are, they still count as good memories.


Woof. Considering that I haven’t tapped even half the pictures I took, this article could very well go on forever. We certainly don’t want that, now do we? No. So, keeping everyone’s best interest in mind, I’ll stop here for the moment and call it Part One. How many more will there be? Who knows! It’ll likely only be a two-parter, but if I’m as verbose with ther rest of the pictures as I’ve been with the ones I’ve posted so far, we’ll likely be seeing a Part Three as well. But that’ll be the absolute limit. Even if I tried, there’s no way I could justify doing this in a four-part series. I guess you can’t really put a limit on your memories, but the honest truth is that most of the events that I found significant and still dream happily about would be viewed as horribly mundane by pretty much anyone else. So keep an eye out for number two. Given how long it took me to finish this one, we should be seeing it by the second half of 2011.

Children of the by-products

I’m a huge fan of horror movies. I think most are aware of this fact. The thing is, I missed a lot because my search for classics rarely ever took me any farther back than the late 70’s. As of late though, I’ve been really into the really old stuff, as I mentioned quite recently. Since any moives, nevermind horror, that are that old are hard to come across, I have a tendency to pick up anything I find that looks like it may have come before Jason and Freddy arrived on the scene.

And that beings us to the It’s Alive trilogy. conveniently sold in a three-pack. It was only $12 at Wal-Mart too, so how could I say no? Matt had actually mentioned on his blog that he’d bought the first movie that day, and I thought it was more than coincidence for me to see the entire trilogy sitting there for what amounts to little more than pocket change.

The thing about movies though, is that I buy them by the armfuls, and then never feel like commiting the twoish hours to sit down and watch them. I did watch all three It’s alive movies though, it took about a month, but by gum I did it! Didn’t even sleep thorugh any! The great part is that they’re actually pretty good!

The basic plot of the first movie is that a guy and his wife give birth to this freak baby, who immediately slaughters everyone in the delivery room, and then escapes and goes on a bloody rampage. You wouldn’t know it, but it ends up being social commentary and haing a moral message of sorts. The second and thrid movies take the overall story and themes and expand on them, causing a little less bloodshed each time, but remaining interesting and (to some degree) meaningful.

The nice thing about these movies is that they very rarely give you good glimpses of the creatures. I mean, the first one was made in 1974, and puppetry wasn’t quite up to standards at the time, but I like that way of doing things. It gives you a chance to imagine on your own what the little buggers look like, and in that respect, I’m a little disappointed that with each sequel, the creatures get more and more screentime.

When all’s said and done, I quite enjoiyed the It’s Alive trilogy. Some would likely debate that they go down in quality as they progress, but I think they keep up appearances long enough to make it through all three movies. Had there been a fourth movie, that probably would have been pushing it, but three is the charm here. For the price, this trilogy set is absolutely recommended, if only for the groan-inducing interior decorating in the fisrt and second movies. Oh, the early seventies, how tacky you were!

Special effects are overrated

I’ve been pretty hooked on two channels lately: Turner Classic Movies and American Movie Classics. It got to the point of realizing I had a problem when I stayed up all night last Halloween watching a Boris Karloff marathon, even though I had to work the next morning. But so what? Old movies kick ass, and watching those two channels as much as I have recently has made me realize just how much everything that comes out of Hollywood these days kinda sucks. I miss low-budget special effects. I miss completely retarded stories that somehow contain a brilliant social commentary. I miss camp. Oh sweet Jesus, do I miss camp.

For years I’ve known the story of War of the Worlds, as well as the infamous radio version debacle. It’s one of my favourite science fiction stories of all time. As I walked out of the newer version of the flick, pretty much all I heard was people complaining about the ending. What the fuck guys? It’s an incredibly popular story, how the Hell did you miss it? In any case, I really liked it, Tom Cruise and all.

I’d never seen the original film version of War of the Worlds until recently, when I caught it on AMC one lazy Sunday afternoon. I was lucky enough to flip by right a the beginning, and intrigued by the fact that it was the original, I decided it was something that I must watch. Not a week later I was out trying to find the film on DVD (needless to say, I loved it), and came across the beauty you see to the left.

Double/triple feature DVDs seem to be all the rage right now, as I see more and more of them every time I browse the movie sections at Wal-Mart and Best Buy. Most of the time, they don’t seem like anything I care to invest in, but the odd time I come across pure gold, like the War of the Worlds/When Worlds Collide pack, and the It’s Alive trilogy (more on that another day). I’d never even heard of When Worlds Collide when I saw this, but given that I was going to buy War of the Worlds anyway, and the double pack was the same price as the solo WotW, it was kind of a brainless move.

I’m going to assume that everyone knows the general plot to War of the Worlds, so I’ll skip that part. If you don’t have any idea what it’s about, you might want to catch up on your genre-defining stories, you uncultured swine. Anyway, I like it way more than the new one. Yeah, it may lack fancy-pants special effect, but the crap effects are hilarious and take me back to a day I wasn’t around to actually experience. The characters, though many more in number, are better if anything, and the entire movie has an undeniable charm that makes it totally lovable. The next logical step for me would be to, you know, read the book.

When Worlds Collide is a very similar beast, though mostly because old sci-fi movies all have a lot in common. Like the gigantic plot holes, for example! The premise for this movie is that a foreign planet is on route to pass close by to the Earth, with its sun following right behind, which is on a direct crash-course with Earth. So what to do? Build a rocket ship to carry a handful of people onto the new planet as it passes by so that the human race isn’t totally wiped out when Earth is crushed by the oncoming star. This was totally sound in 1951, but knowing all we do about space and stuff these days, the timeframe of the movie really fudges up a lot of stuff. The most notable oversight being that the Earth would be burnt to a crisp long before the star smashes into it, which the movie completely fails to consider.

But it’s okay! When Worlds Collide is otherwise a decent movie! The pacing is a little fast, because the plot runs over the course of about a year. In that respect, you miss some of the necessary gradual progression of things like relationships between the characters, but this fault can be overlooked, because otherwise the movie would be like five hours long. The characters are generally pretty likable, some in a “love to hate” way, and the plot is a pretty fun sci-fi take on early space exploration. Granted, I slept through about 15 minutes in the middle, but I’m happy to have watched this movie. It’s the kind of thing you put on every once in a while to remind you that global disaster movies used to be good.

Do I recommend this DVD set? Hells yeah! These are two timeless stories that everyone should be able to enjoy. They’re fun and touching, and I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t enjoy them. I know I enjoy a lot of crappy movies, but I firmly believe that War of the Worlds and When Worlds Collide are two great films. That said, I’m old.

Feel the glow of commerce

Since the theme around here this year seems to be really heavy on materialism, I think I’ve got a good idea! Well, maybe an okay idea. I’ve already got two days covered, so I’ve decided that until the 24th, I’m going to post and review one item I’ve recently bought per day. Kind of like a poor man’s version of a certain other site’s annual holiday countdowns. expect mostly movies and CDs, but possibly some surprises. Who knows? I haven’t really thought it through yet.

Today’s entry is going to play off yesterday’s lengthy post, in that it’s also Fullmetal Alchemist related. This time, it’s the movie! Yes, that’s right. After watching the series, I tried downloading this like three times, but always managed to get alternate language versions (French, German, and Japanese). I really wish people would tag their torrents better. So I gave up, and when I was out getting the season one box sets, I decided to pick the movie up to. For completion’s sake, you see.

I’ll note at this point that I got the standard edition. There was a two-disc special edition as well, but it was significantly more moneys, and the extra bonus features really didn’t sell me on spending nearly double what I intended to. Plus, I’d never seen the thing, and I couldn’t justify dropping that much on something I might end up not liking. I’m an impulse buyer at heart, but I only pick up stuff I’m gambling on when it’s cheap.

Long story short, I think I made the right move. This is not to say that the Fullmetal Alchemist movie is a bad movie. In fact, it was a rather inspired movie, keeping with the general feel of the show, yet introducing some other, possibly even deeper concepts. Since it plays directly off the ending of the series, I won’t go into detail about the plot to prevent spoilers (even though by this point anyone who cares has seen every episode).

Much like the series, the FMA movie is mostly about plot and character development. A couple new people are in there and don’t get quite as much screen time as you’d expect for a major character, but they still manage to give you more than enough details to identify with these characters and understand exactly who they are and why they’re motivated to do what they do. The downside is that for anyone who isn’t a fan of the show, most of the recurring characters and mechanics are only briefly introduced (Wrath in particular), and you’ll have no idea who they are or how they manage to do the things they do. Of course, I doubt many people who didn’t follow the seires will be watching the movie, but still.

In keeping with the focus on the characters, action sequences are kept short and aren’t overly common, which again coincides with the show’s formula. The movie actually opens with an undeniably fun action scene, which makes for a really good hook, but from there on in, it’s about an hour until the next. I’m not griping about this or anything, just stating the facts. Fanservice is minimal too, and kept to fit with the plot. They don’t hamfistedly cram any fan-favourite characters in just to please, excpt for when Scar sort of shows up at the end, but even that’s a perfectly reasonable appearance.

In the end, I can’t say that the Fullmetal Alchemist movie really lived up to the the series. It was a good way to end the story, but didn’t completely satisfy. For all the good things that it brings to the table, the middle is uncharacteristically slow and somewhat dull. That’s about all I ahve to gripe about though. The extras that come with the standard edition DVD are more than enough, including a huge 18-page booklet filled with notes on the movie’s development, character and theme information, and artwork. Also included are a 40-minute “making of” documentary, trailers and art galleries. I don’t remember what extras were on the special edition, but they weren’t enough for me to justify spending almost double. In all, I recommend the standard edition to the fan, special edition being reserved more for the fanboy and those with money to blow. Outsiders will just be confused as all hell, so unless you intend to watch the entire series first, FMA newbs should just stay away.

Murder? Check.

I went out after work today to find some stuff. Stuff to buy. The main object of my quest was Dethklok’s album, The Dethalbum. I did not find it. This is bad. My parents got me the soundtracks for the first two (original) Star Wars movies for Christmas like ten years ago, but never got me the Jedi soundtrack. Today, after years of searching, I found it. This is good. I finally got around to watching Resident Evil: Apocalypse last night. It was a little silly at some points, but overall I liked it, and decided I wanted to purchase the first RE movie. I could not find it though. This is bad. However, I was marginally surprised that Corner Gas Season 4 had snuck into stores without me noticing. This is good.

Um, I guess the moral of this story is that I really want The Dethalbum. I have it downloaded (two copies, actually), but it’s a CD I kind of need to own. Have you heard the album version of “Thunderhorse”? It’s like a billion times more metal than the watered-down version that’s on Guitar Hero 2. But I’ll warn you though, not just anybody should listen to it, because I’m pretty sure that it’s so brutal that it will literally kill anyone who’s not awesome enough. Oh, what the Hell? Fuck copyrights, here, download it. And now that I’ve done you that favour, do me one and go buy The Dethalbum. Maybe if I can convince people to buy it, nobody will sue me for putting that song there.

Oh, and if you’ve never heard of Dethklok… yeah…

I can get back on

It’s been June for a few days now, and with another week of vacation looming on the horizon, I guess there’s no better time to get the Band of the Month post done with is the present. This month? RUSH!

Yeah, that’s right. It’s mother fucking RUSH!!! I don’t know… I kind of get excited when talking about Rush, or listening to Rush, or thinking about Rush… Odd obsession aside, I obviously love the band. For a while back in the day I really couldn’t get why everyone seemed to like them so much, and then it hit me like a ton of bricks. I still don’t quite understand it, but Rush is up near the top of the list of my favourite bands.

What better time to do a Band of the Month on Rush than June? The answer: May. Seven days ago May to be particular, when they released their most recent album: Snakes And Arrows. I only picked it up yesterday (what in God’s name took so long?), and to tell the truth, I was really looking for Harlequin’s new disc, Waking The Jester, but had no luck there. Snakes and Arrows was technically my consolation prize… Damn. It’s odd though, because I’ve heard their new single “Far Cry” on the radio tons of times, and each time I said to myself that I should go pick up the CD, but it never really happened until yesterday. Odd.

Anyhow, Rush has a pretty nice place in mainstream entertainment too. Not only is “Spirit of Radio” the Trailer Park Boys Movie theme (not to mention that the Big Dirty Band was founded by Alex Lifeson and features Geddy Lee), but there was a whole episode revolving around them in season four; it remains one of my favourite episodes. The wicked instrumental piece “YYZ” is one of the most fun songs to play in Guitar Hero 2, and Fry’s “Rush mixtape” is one of my choice Futurama moments (right behind every scene with Zoidberg in it, and the entire “Roswell That Ends Well” Episode).

Official site

Rush on Last.fm

Wikipedia: Rush

Wikipedia: the Big Dirty Band