Yesterday was pretty cool. Went and saw Cloverfield, which maybe didn’t quite live up to the hype, but I still enjoyed it. Also learned the basics of how to drive stick, so I won’t be fudged if the time comes where it’s do or die and that’s the skill that decides my fate. Quite possibly best of all, I ate three double quarter pounders for lunch. Mmmm I loves me some burger. But despite all the good things, I can’t help but have an unshakable uneasiness in the pit of my stomach (which is not beef-related). See, yesterday evening I got peer-pressured into applying for a promotion.
The reason I say “peer-pressured” is because I have a dangerously low level of self-confidence, especially when it comes to things like this. If I hadn’t been bombarded by co-workers telling me that I had to go for this stupid position from the moment I walked in to the moment I submitted my letter, I really doubt I would have gone through with it. They say you’ll never win if you don’t try, but I find the popular theory “trying is the first step to failure” is much more applicable to my life.
Yes, it’s supposed to be a good thing, and by all means, it should work out. I feel that I’m more than qualified for the position, but in the situation that I don’t get it, my very fragile emotional structure will be completely shattered and what little faith I have in myself and my abilities will disappear completely. Oh well. It’ll be wicked if I do get it, because the opening is in either one of two areas, and either way I win. If it’s in outdoors, that’s where I already work and I know pretty much everything there is to know, and I’ll be doing essentially the same thing I’m doing now for more money and with a shiny badge. If it’s in the boys area, I know the subject matter in there pretty well too, plus some other perks that I’m more inclined to keep to myself. So here’s hoping things pan out. If not, well, I suppose I’ll just have to go find a new jorb.