So I just got back from Alberta this afternoon. Canmore, Alberta to be specific. I’ve never been any farther out of Manitoba than Kenora, Ontario, so it was one Hell of a road trip. Just the 16-hour drive would have been enough for me, but the added joy of the woman’s siblings fighting in the back seat all the way there and back made it the Most Wonderful Journey Ever™!
Way back in about fifth grade or so, Old Dutch released a flavour of potato chips that became just less than an obsession for the city of Winnipeg. The phenomenon may have reached farther, I don’t know, but I do know for sure that everyone I knew at the time absolutely loved these chips, and when the Mexican Chili flavour disappeared into the vast blackness of time, the world lost a little bit of its sheen. I mourned the loss just as much as the next man, and over time, they would come up in conversations about beloved things of days gone by. There’s even a Facebook group dedicated to having Old Dutch revive the flavour. But…
What is this I found?
So what’s going on then? I’m not entirely sure. Did the Mexican Chili chips really disappear, or have we all just been shopping at the wrong places? There’s a possibility that they just aren’t distributed in Winnipeg anymore, but that would be completely ridiculous, because Old Dutch’s Canadian headquarters and maufacturing plant is in Winnipeg. Or maybe, and most likely, Old Dutch has heard the call and has put Mexican Chili chips back on their roster. Will we ever know? Well, I could if I were to take a short trip down to the plant, but I really don’t care that much.
The simple fact of the matter is that they’re exactly as I remember them. Delicious and spicy as hell. Though, maybe it’s just because I never eat Rip-L chips, but they seemed uncharacteristically tough and painful to eat. I doubt they were stale, as the bag’s best before date says September, so maybe that’s how they’re suppose to be? It’s probably just that my mouth was softened up because I had eaten Cap’n Crunch for breakfast.
In other, comepletely unrelated news, I went over that last article I wrote and did a few revisions; added a little content for things I’ve experienced more now, and made a couple corrections. But not all possible corrections. Why not? It’s a long story and I’ve already filled up enough of this post with chip talk. So yeah, maybe head back there and check out the two or so new paragraphs I added.
Oh, look! A blog update. How quaint.
But what is this that comes along with it? An “ar-tee-cool”? I have never heard of such a thing! Well, perhaps I’ll check it out anyway. It’s probably not a horrible cop-out just so the author can pretend he’s written something of value this year. And I’ll bet it’s completely spellchecked too. Nobody would just leave a fine piece of writing with all sorts of typos and grammatical errors, right? Right. It’ll be great. I’m sure of it.
It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these mass review articles (usually they’re just blogged). More importantly, it’s been a while since I’ve done an article at all. Much to my own dismay, a cheap mass review is not way to worm my way back into the game, but it’s all I’ve really got the gumption to work on at the moment. It’s not that I don’t want to write articles anymore, it’s just that there are so many other things I want to do more. And even more things I need to be doing.
But I digress. Blabbing about why I’m no longer writing full-length pieces is not today’s topic! But rather I’m here to discuss money well spent? I decided to end that sentence with a question mark because at this point I still can’t gauge the actual quality of most of the products below. I just bought most of them through good word-of-mouth and personal tastes. In fact, I’m pretty sure that at least a couple would be considered complete garbage by the general population, but we’ll see!
So the bonus theme here is that I picked up all this stuff when my girlfriend and I went away to Fargo(, North Dakota) for the weekend. I did a little photo gallery with commentary of last year’s trip south of the border (see sidebar), so maybe you’ll prefer that one if you’re looking for an article with a little more meat on its bones. Also, certainty. This here article, as of this writing, is pretty much all assumptions. It’s built on the hopes and dreams of millions! …Or maybe just me.
• Item #1
Tesla – Five Man Acoustical Jam
Okay, I know said it was all assumptions from here on in, but I’m starting with something I know is awesome: Tesla. I’ve been listening to Tesla for many, many years now, and sadly, I’ve only ever been able to find one of their CDs in any local stores. Thus, I often take it upon myself to scour the multimedia-type shops south of the border for anything I can find by them. This time I got real lucky, finding the two Tesla discs I was really gunning for. Five Man Acoustical Jam is obviously enough, a recording of a live acoustic show. It’s one of very few Tesla albums that I haven’t downloaded, so jackpot!
In other news, it’s completely awesome. Tesla is a great band, and they made their name through their acoustic prowess, so the only logical conclusion is that this album must rule. And rule it does. Don’t know what else there is to say other than I love it. Score: A
• Item #2
Tesla – The Great Radio Controversy
I know it seems silly that I only bought two Tesla CDs while I was down there, and now that I really think about it, I probably am really silly for it. I mean, I probably could have completed the full discography, but I stopped looking after I picked up these two.
Unlike its lovably live cousin above, The Great Radio Controversy is a studio album, but that means little. The Tesla-loving community largely believes this to be their finest work, and I’m not one to argue. It’s everything that makes Tesla great (minus the “awesome live performers” bit), and while it may not rock quite as hard as Psychotic Supper, it rocks just as well or better. Two thumbs up. Score: A
• Item #3
Mega Man Star Force 2
Yeah, I know you’re groaning right now and about to skip this paragraph, but that’s quite alright. You put up with more than enough of my Mega Man nonsense that you deserve a break from it if you can find one here or there. So go ahead and move on to the next item if you’ve gotten sick of hearing me rave about Mega Man.
For those that care, Star Force is the dual-screened big brother to the MegaMan Battle Network games. It seems like it’ll be following the same “new chapter every summer” release schedule that Battle Network had. I played the first one almost to completion last summer (I didn’t beat the final optional boss), and I was surprised to see this one in stores because honestly, I had no idea it was out. so I picked it up, and I’ve got to say, it’s most certainly not as big a step up from the first as Battle Network 2 was to its predecessor. I mean, I’m enjoying the game, but it hasn’t offered anything that improves on the first game. Well, not enough to make it feel exciting and new anyway. Score: C+
• Item #4
Etrian Odyssey 2: Heroes of Lagaard
As soon as I’d finally stopped flip-flopping on whether I wanted the first Etrian Odyssey or not, it had long since become impossible to find at retail. I was afraid EO2 would see a similar fate (despite being a new release), but after searching each and every store that sells video games in Fargo, I gave up and checked GameStop. As much as I generally loathe the GameStop/EB chain, it has to be said that they do actually carry Atlus games, and as a fan of Atlus’ niche titles, that scores some decent points in my book.
Anyway, I haven’t actually had a chance to plug it in and start playing yet (probably because I’m awasting all sorts of time writing about shit I buy), but I’ve read more than enough on the subject to be more or less familiar with what I’m getting into. The Youngest One bought it too (before I had a chance to advise him otherwise), probably because he thought “Ooh, an RPG. I should buy it”, and promptly got his ass whupped and put it right down. I doubt he’ll be spending too much time on this one, but someday when I’m in the middle of fewer games, I’ll crack this one open and spend a little quality time with it.
Edit : Decided I’d just forego finishing some other games so I could sink my teeth into this one. I’m not regretting it. Etrian Odyssey II is even better than I’d imagined. This is a real horror game, because you’re always on the edge of your seat, wondering if you’ll be able to survive the next fight. Also, even the slightest progress feels like you’ve made a huge accomplishment, so yeah. props to that. Love it. Score: A
• Item #5
Day of the Dead
No, it’s not Romero’s classic with a new cover. It’s one of those horrid “re-imaginings”, or so I assume. At least on the back cover it said it’s inspired by Romero’s Day of the Dead, so we can hope it at least pays a little homage to the original. In any case, it’s a zombie movie, so it most definitely belongs in my collection.
I should let you know that I fully expect this to be completely awful. That’s how these movies are. The characters are stupid and unlikable, the plot makes little to no sense and there’s buckets and buckets of gore. Yeah it sounds like a disaster, but that’s exactly what I’m looking for. I enjoy a good zombie movie, but I love a zombie movie that makes you want to root for the zombies. It’s brainless (in a manner of speaking) fun, and that’s really what I want in movies. So despite the fact that it’s defacing a classic, I have high-ish hopes for this one.
Edit : Yeah. So I watched it, and it’s not so great. It has almost nothing in common with the original, though if you concentrate real hard you can find a couple loose parallels between the two. But yeah, it’s not even a fun gore-fest. Just low-grade zombie schlock. When Nick Cannon is the best part of a movie, you know that you’ve got a bit of a train wreck on your hands. I’m a little let down by this one, honestly. Score: D+
• Item #6
The Dead Pit
As I was perusing the horror section at Fargo’s Best Buy (why doesn’t our Best Buy sort movies by genre? It’s so much easier…), and I saw that Day of the Dead remake thing, and then right beside it, The Dead Pit caught my eye. The cover didn’t really get the idea of zombies across to me, but reading the synopsis on the back confirmed my suspicions: zombies!
Much to my delight, this is one of those 80’s zombie flicks that pretends to have a cohesive plot. By that of course, I mean it’s more than “OMG zombiez. Let’s try to survive!” Something about a mad scientist attacking a mental ward with a horde of zombies? I dunno and I’m too lazy to go check the case, but it sounded like a riot at the time. I honestly think this could be as unpredictably lovable as Hellraiser. Score: B (pending)
• Item #7
Chucky: The Killer DVD Collection
I’ll level with ya, I’ve only ever seen the first Child’s Play movie, and even then, I was still a little squeamish at the time and covered my eyes a lot. I did like the movie though, and I’ve always wanted to at least see the first two sequels. Bride of Chucky isn’t exactly a priority, and Seed of Chucky seems like they’re just taking it too far. Alas.
I’ve been putting off buying this collection for a while now because I knew that not having the first one would drive me bonkers (OCD, you see), but it actually hasn’t been grating on my nerves too much. It’s not like the movie isn’t on DVD or anything either, I just can’t find the damn thing anywhere. Oh well. I’m sure some day I’ll be in the right place at the right time, and it will be mine. Or I’ll have forgotten my wallet and smack myself in the forehead. Score: B+ (pending)
• Item #8
Bruce and Lloyd: Out of Control
I’ll say this now, because it’s the most important note here: I was promised a lot more Patrick Warburton than I got from this purchase, and it makes me ever so slightly disappointed. Other than that, good times!
If you haven’t seen Get Smart yet, you’re really missing out on something. I loved it so much, I ran out an bought this straight-to-DVD supplemental material without even reading a review first. Fortunately, it’s not nearly as awful as most straight-to-DVD stuff, but it’s still nowhere near as great as the main movie. Then again, I never expected it to be. I’m just confused as to why exactly Steve Carell couldn’t make at least a cameo. Anne Hathaway shows up in one scene, so why do we get no Steve Carell? Ah well. If Get Smart was at the “hilarious” level, I’d probably only rate this one as “silly” at best, but it’s still worth a look if you liked the source material. Score: B
Also, I should mention that I bought some other stuff, like shorts and foodstuffs, but I decided to cut them out because clothes are boring (do not tell my girlfriend I said that, she bought clothes almost exclusively) and junk food isn’t something that really needs to be logged into the annals of internet history. At least, not any of the food I bought. It was all pretty much run-of-the-mill junk food that a) isn’t available in Canada or b) is ridiculously expensive in Canada. So yeah. That’s the end then. Good night.
Not as though I’d be doing too much blogging anyhow, but for the next couple days we’re heading down to Fargo to celebrate… well, not working for like four days? I dunno. Going down to the States to celebrate Canada Day seems a little dumb, but there really isn’t any other occasion. I suppose it’s just for the sake of shopping and getting away. Yeah.
So how about that Mega Man 9 news? Pretty damn awesome, I’d say. This is exactly what digital distribution is all about. I suppose that means that Capcom will finally be putting all the old Mega Man games on the Virtual Console then? I have the Anniversary Collection, so I wouldn’t be buying them, but it would be nice to know that they’re there.
I don’t know if you’ve heard the news yet, but as it turns out, my girlfriend is a genius. Yeah. It’s pretty awesome. I don’t really have much else to blog about right now, but I wanted to brag anyway.
I know just as well as anyone that I’ve been doing an absolutely atrocious job of keeping a blog as of late. I ‘ve been slacking of on my comicing duties pretty badly too, and does anyone remember when the last time I wrote an article was? Sad to say, but I don’t really see that changing anytime soon. I’d like to be able to just blame all the crazy hours I’ve been working lately, but I think we all know that it’s because I’ve been spending most of my free time on something a wee bit more important than websites that nobody reads.
So, whether my blog is shitty or not, I just popped in to say that I picked up Guitar Hero DS yeterday, and am still on the fence about whether I’m impressed with the job they did. The game itself is just fine, it’s got pretty much all the Guitar Hero frills, just watered down a little so that it could all fit on the tiny DS card. And speaking of fitting, there are 25 songs in the game, and the sound quality is as good as I’ve heard on the DS, as long as you’re pumping it through external speakers or headphones; Mr T. pities the foo who settles for the DS speakers. The setlist itself is way under par for a Guitar Hero game, including a bunch of songs that really have no business there (Maroon 5? WTF?), but I suppose we can chalk the somewhat more varied musical range to that fact that the DS has that huge “casual” following, and most of the old people I know don’t particularly enjoy metal and punk. I’ll be happy though, as it does feature “Spiderwebs” by No Doubt, and as I’ve told pretty much everyone I know, I love Tragic Kingdom and almost every song from it. Also, “Jessie’s Girl”! How can you not love that song?
The issue that I have with it is with the insane little guitar grip peripheral that is used to play the game. Oh, it works fine, and I eventually found my most comfortable way to hold it, but the problem is that it’s too small. Actually that’s a poor choice of words. What I meant to say is that the buttons are way too close together. Normally it’s passable, but once you get onto the expert level and try to mash your way through some of the harder solos, you’re just fucked because your fingers will be mashing each other and everything just goes to Hell. Even small hammer-on/pull-off sequences can be tricky. If they had just added about a quarter of an inch between each button, things would be so much better, and the contraption wouldn’t even be that much bigger. So yeah, other than the fact that I’ll never be good at soloing on it, I’ll give Guitar Hero DS a passing grade. I just hope that they whip up an improved grip for the inevitable sequel.
Among the various things we do together, the woman and I have taken to going out (at least) every Tuesday night to see a movie. So in the last month and a half, I’ve had more visits to the theater than I generally would over the span of a year. Unfortunately, they can’t all be as fantastic as Iron Man, but here’s a quick rundown of some of the flicks I’ve gone to see lately.
Sex and the City : The most recent movie outing was obviously entirely by her choice. I’ve only ever watched the show because we were watching TV one night and she decided that that’s what we’d be watching. Anyway, I cannot say I detested the movie. It was not something I enjoyed either, being two and a half hours of clothes and girl talk, but there were just enough legitimately funny moments that I wasn’t overly compelled to kill myself just to make it end. I shouldn’t have to tell guys to stay away from this one, but not falling asleep and pretending it wasn’t so bad will make your woman happy.
The Strangers : I was totally psyched to see this one. I love scary movies, and even the trailer had me creeped out. It actually did deliver on that promise of scariness, too. The creepy mask people were in fact creepy as all Hell, appearing out of nowhere and then sliently fading back into the shadows. I still get the jibblies when I’m in the dark and that damn sack mask enters my mind. The horror aspect of the movie was great and worth seeing it for, but otherwise, there wasn’t much. The plot was really bare-bones, and nothing really happened. It’s like the horror version of Open Water; a drawn-out dramatization of a true story.
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull : I thought it was great, no surprise there. I’ve actually only ever seen Raiders of the Lost Ark, but I’m pretty sure that this movie lives up pretty well to the original Indiana Jones trilogy (well, that’s what I hear). It’s was plenty of fun, and I quite enjoyed even the scenes that some claim may have been a bit over-the-top. My only qualm with the movie is that it was all about aliens. Had we heard a bit more about whatever (assumed) Area 51 goodies they found in the opening scene, I may have been more at ease with it, but as it stands that scene was totally unrelated and mostly served just to introduce the villain. But I wasn’t even too annoyed by Shia Labeouf, and I can’t stand that guy, so we’ll call it a pretty huge success.
Made of Honor : Again, not my choice. But to my surprise, it was totally bearable! In fact, I might even risk my right to be called a man by saying I maybe even enjoyed it a little. Throughout the movie, I couldn’t help but think of how much Patrick Dempsey’s character reminded me of Robert Downey Jr’s Tony Stark. In any case, the “comedy” portion of romantic comedy was the one that was emphasized in this movie, and it also helps that the story revolved around the male lead character and not the female. I’d say that if you’re stuck seeing a chick flick, this is probably as good as you’re going to get.
What Happens in Vegas : We saw this one on a whim because we were late for Made of Honor that day, but it turned out really well. It stars Ashton Kutcher and Cameron Diaz, so you’re not going to be getting a strong story or intelligent humour, but I’ll admit that I did like this one. Pretentious assholes who are too self-involved to enjoy the everyman’s comedy won’t get anything from it, but if you see the humour in fart jokes and the like, then you’re in for a pretty good time.
88 Minutes : I’m not one for the crime drama genre, or whatever it is that this one falls under, but I guess it was good? I was supremely bored with Michael Clayton, but 88 Minutes managed to hold my attention for the duration of the movie, so that’s something. Maybe. I guess. I really don’t know what else to say. I haven’t talked to anyone else who’s seen it, or read any reviews or anything, so I don’t really have anything to go on. In conclusion, I enjoyed it, and the woman enjoyed it, so nobody’s complaining. Do I actually need to say somethign about the movies when I do these short little one-paragraph reviews?
Needless to say, it’s been kind of a busy month. I am pretty wizziped out right now, and should probably be catching up on sleep rather than blogging. But I haven’t blogged in weeks! One might say I haven’t had a good sleep in at least as long, but that’s besides the point. I’ve kind of let video games drop off my to-do list lately, barely able to find time to cram in games I’ve been working on for a while, much less new ones. So just so you know what I’m trying to play as of late, here are some impressions of said games.
Mario Kart Wii : Is there anything more frustrating than Mario Kart? The rubber-band AI is infuriating, but at the same time, when you win, you feel like you’ve really accomplished something. And of course, multiplayer is a blast too. But I think this one’s even more broken than ever, because I earned gold trophies on every grand prix on every difficulty on Mario Kart DS, but I just barely struggled my way to victory in the 100cc class in this iteration. But like I said, multiplayer really makes up for it. I’ve yet to win a single online match, but I’ve enjoyed each and every race I’ve participated in.
Baroque : A roguelike, but not. The only difference is that it’s not turn-based. I’ve developed a really bad crush on roguelikes as of late (as I may have said before) and Baroque is sating my need nicely. The real-time thing makes it noticably easier than turn-based roguelikes, but that’s okay. After being completely destroyed over and over in Shiren the Wanderer and Izuna, I like having a place to go where I can make some notable progress. Although it’s hard to tell exactly when you’re making progress in Baroque, because it’s structured very differently from any game I’ve ever played, but still, goodness. The somewhat macabre aesthetic really helps keep me into it too.
Pokémon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Time : Before we move off the topic of roguelikes, I might as well mention the pokémon entry. It’s probably the only roguelike that non-niche gamers will ever play, but in that, it’s a great way to draw in new fans to the genre. It’s not a (comparative) cakewalk like Baroque, but it’s cerainly not as brutal as Shiren. It stands to reason though, because the target demographic is between the 5- to 10-year-old age range, and I don’t recall children being overly fond of games that are as merciless as the common roguelike. But do I like the game? Uuuh, yeah. It’s Pokémon, come on. I actually skipped the first set of Pokémon Mystery Dungeon games, but I’m glad I broke down and picked one up this time around.
Crosswords DS : Hey fuck you. I love doing crossword puzzles, especially when they don’t reference pop culture and I’m able to solve them. But what’s better? The card is not only loaded with bajillions of crosswords; it’s got a vast expanse of word search puzzles too! Do you have any idea how many giant word search books I burned through in my childhood? Lots.
Final Fantasy: Crystal Chronicles: My Life As A King : I am in love with this game. I’m seriously considering spending less time with my girlfriend so I can play this game more*. I even tried to write a comic about it. And I sort of described how much I like it there too, so just go there if you want to read that.
The World Ends With You : Oh, wait. I haven’t actually started playing this yet. But it looks so good! Well, not literally. I’m actually getting kind of tired of Tetsuya Nomura, but the gameplay aspect seems like it’s really fun. So yeah. Maybe I’ll be able start it by the end of the summer. I’ll let you know.
*I’m not actually considering that. I’m dumb, but not that dumb.
A while back, I sent in my Wii copy of Guitar Hero 3 to be replaced with a disc that could output audio at more than a mono level. It took a really really long time for it to come back, but it has, and about a week before it did, I received something completely different from RedOctane and Activision.
