Back in the day, one of the most exciting things about the Xmas season is that my grandparents would always make a huge, elaborate gingerbread house, and send it over for us. There was always some contention over when it was okay to start eating it, and you know darn well that I would spend the season picking away at little bits of it.
Honestly, I think the buildup and bit-sneaking was actually the best part. Gingerbread houses have never been quite as delicious as I want them to be. It might be because I don’t really like gingerbread as much as I feel like I should. A nice gingerbread house is always delightful to have around, though. Makes for a really nice showpiece.
I’ve never actually made a gingerbread house myself, though. And this year shall be no exception! I’m not shelling out for a proper kit! Those things cost way more than they’re worth. However…
I do in fact have a gingerbread Millennium Falcon. I got this for Xmas (or maybe slightly before) like five years ago, and never took the time to put it together. It’s just been sitting in my cupboard all this time.
The disappointing thing about this kit is that you don’t really get to make anything with it. The Falcon itself is just a single, giant slab of gingerbread. The base is made out of four chunks that you need to glue together with icing, but that’s it. Your only real creative outlet with this kit is where you slather the remaining icing to glue on the little candy balls that come with it. Not the most compelling.
Now we need to factor in how this kit is over four years past its best before date, and we get to the real problems. The gingerbread was covered with a slimy film, which I don’t even really know what that is or how it happened. I mean, I guess it’s some sort of mold, but I’ve never seen anything quite like it. Then you have the icing, which was congealed into a solid brick. I tried to soften it up by leaving it in a pot of boiling water for a bit, but that just caused the brick to weaken and break down into crumbs, rather than to return to a fluid state that I was expecting.
And so, my great gingerbread project was a complete and total failure. I didn’t even get to eat it afterwards because time had left every aspect of it in a rather disgusting state. Even the little candy balls had lost all flavour, or at least I’m presuming that they did. It could be that they were garbage to begin with. Hopefully, if you do your own gingerbread something-or-other, it will not be nearly as disastrous as mine. I have nobody to blame but myself, though, for sleeping on this for so long.