I handed in my resignation at work today. I’ve worked at Toys ‘R’ Us for just over three years now, and it was time to call it quits. Fortunately, I do have a new job to go to, so it’s not like every other job I’ve left where I just quit to be an unemployed bum. Also, it’s a really good new job! So no more retail/fast food for ol’ Ryan!
The weird part that even with all the anxiety all the interviewing and waiting and worrying about being able to do this new job, I think I was most nervous about leaving TRU. Not because I especially love it or anything. It’s not a bad job, but after three years, it’s more than worn on me. Anyway, what I believe the butterflies in my tummy were all about was leaving my safe place. Like I said, I’ve been there three years now, and it’s something I can do. I might be so brash as to say that I’m really good at it. It’s not great pay, but it gets me by, and I know they may not say it all the time, but they do value my hard work. And now I’m cutting away that wonderful little safety net, and taking a plunge, hoping that there’s a bigger, comfier one somewhere farther down the gorge. Or wherever that metaphor was going.
I’m sure everything will work out okay, and if somehow I’m just awful at the new job (highly unlikely) I suppose they won’t mind taking me back. At severely reduced pay of course, but at least I’ll have a job. It’s been many, many years since I’ve been this scared, since about the time I got my first job at Tim Horton’s. I’m playing in a whole different league now, and while I’m sure I’m up to the challenge, I’m having a very hard time convincing myself of it.
Oh, and if you’re my new employer and are reading this, disregard that whole lack of self-confidence thing. That’s just for dramatic effect.