This is not speculation

So I had the items in the picture below as a snack today. Turns out I picked the wrong ones on both counts. I’m special!

First, the Doritos. Doritos apparently have not one, but three questionably new flavours out right now. Each one is assigned a degree of burnination. I guess they’re supposed to be really spicy? Being the lover of spicy things, I went for what I thought was the most spicy of the three. As it just so happens, I have no idea which way the burn degrees go. So really, I picked the weakest of the three, as I was informed after I got home and looked at the back of the package. There’s a little picture of a thermometer with the temperature just above the bottom, and an arrow which informs me that my heat level is there.

But damn, those Blazin’ Jalapenos were hot! My mouth was positively aflame! Well, of course it wasn’t actually on fire, but I imagine it would have been if I’d chosen one of the flavours farther up the spiceometer. Like, they were even more intense than the spicy thai ramen noodles that I love so much. There is no doubt in my mind that the Firey Buffalo and Scorchin’ Habanero will break me like a little girl when I try them (and you know I will). Also, I’m not a huge fan of ha-ha-halapeno, so the taste didn’t even resonate with me very well. Better than eating a straight jalapeno pepper, but not by a whole lot.

The Pepsi, on the other hand, was a fault of both my stupidity and my lack of attention to detail. There was a sign on the chip stand that said if you buy a Pepsi and a bag of Doritos, you get a slight discount. So why wouldn’t I? I never say no to an ice cold delicious Pepsi. I noticed the advertised Pepsi bottle has a green band around the top of the label, and assumed it was just part of the cross-promotion. Well it was, but it also served to differentiate the Pepsi With Lime from Good Pepsi. Of course I also failed to notice this until I got home.

Not a fan of the Lime Pepsi. It’s been promoted before, but I never tried it until now because it sounded like something that I would find disgusting. I don’t really think it’s that bad, but I surely will never drink it again if superior options exist. It’s like someone got 7up all in my Pepsi, but it negated the Pepsi and lemon flavours and just left lime and something that sort of tastes like it might be a creepy uncle in the Pepsi family. 7up and Pepsi mixed actually taste much better. But yeah, the lime flavour is overpowering and I obviously could stand it long enough to finish the bottle, but that’s never happening again. From now on, I pay damn close attention to my Pepsi labels.


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