{"id":6369,"date":"2017-01-09T09:56:58","date_gmt":"2017-01-09T14:56:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/?p=6369"},"modified":"2017-01-09T09:56:58","modified_gmt":"2017-01-09T14:56:58","slug":"im-going-to-be-talking-about-sandwiches-again","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/?p=6369","title":{"rendered":"I&#8217;m going to be talking about sandwiches again"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Prepare your mind, for it is about to be blown. For after many years of intense training and studying, I have finally completed the\u00a0Perfect Sandwich. Behold\u00a0its majesty.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-large\" src=\"http:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/images\/ultiwich.jpg\" width=\"375\" height=\"500\" \/><\/p>\n<p>In an effort to benefit all of humanity, I will now share the secrets\u00a0of this sandwich. Please craft it with love in your heart and a rumbly in your tumbly. This sandwich should never be used for the forces of evil, or for personal gain.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Toasted honey oat whole wheat bread<\/li>\n<li>Precisely one and a half slices of cheese<\/li>\n<li>Slightly more salami than necessary<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=f0e1au1JwQc\">A dickload of ham<\/a><\/li>\n<li>Top it with a\u00a0generous portion of pickle slices<\/li>\n<li>An explosion of Curry Dijon mustard (top slice)<\/li>\n<li>A fine layer of margarine (bottom slice)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Go now, prepare yourself this delicious sandwich, and revel in all of its tasty glory. If you would like to submit your own (wrong) suggestions of what the perfect sandwich is, please feel free to leave a comment. But we all know that nobody reads this anyway, so meeeeh.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Prepare your mind, for it is about to be blown. For after many years of intense training and studying, I have finally completed the\u00a0Perfect Sandwich. Behold\u00a0its majesty. In an effort to benefit all of humanity, I will now share the secrets\u00a0of this sandwich. Please craft it with love in your heart and a rumbly in &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/?p=6369\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">I&#8217;m going to be talking about sandwiches again<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6369","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-foodstuffs"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6369","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6369"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6369\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6373,"href":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6369\/revisions\/6373"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6369"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6369"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torrentialequilibrium.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6369"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}