Spooktober Movies – The Thirdening

Shin Godzilla – You know, I was so sure that I had written about this last time I watched it, but I cannot find such a post in the archive. So I guess I didn’t!

Here’s the short review: Shin Godzilla is AWESOME.

Long version: This is a reboot of sorts, wherein Japan is only being attacked by Godzilla for the first time, and there are no other monsters, and it’s gone back to being more of a social commentary than a movie about guys wrestling in rubber monster suits. Only instead of being about the dangers of nuclear weapons, it’s about the ineptitude of the old Japanese government officials. Nobody is willing to act in a crisis, much less tell the truth about what is happening. It’s only when most… you know what, the rest is kind of a spoiler, and you should absolutely watch this movie to figure it out yourself.

Godzilla himself is pretty much as awesome as he’s ever been. I really liked the recent Amercian movie’s “tired old man” version of Godzilla, but this one is pretty dang baller, too. He’s got a number of new tricks up his… uh, scales? Well, different things happen. Radically different things. And then… no, no… I can’t spoil that, either.

I really love this movie, is the point I’m trying to get across. I can and have and will watch it again and again and again. What I really need to do is actually buy the damned blu-ray and mount it on my wall as a testament to this being my favourite Godzilla movie. The only issue I take with it is that the subtitles are white and not outlined, which makes them hard/impossible to read at times. Rookie mistake, guys. But still! Watch this dang movie!

The Texas Chain Saw Massacre – This is the original, baby. I have the super-special metal case edition, with an entire extra DVD of special features I’ll never ever watch. I’d sure like that kind of edition for Shin Godzilla. I’d definitely watch those special features.

But anyway, I feel like you probably know this one. It’s fairly old. Kids on road trip find spooky old house, most are killed by mask-wearing psychopath, final girl learns about family of cannibals that kill and eat kids on road trips that pass by. Ta-dah! The last half-hour of the whole thing is basically just said final girl screaming her heart out while trapped by/escaping the crazies.

To be honest, I had a rough time getting through this one. I know it’s a classic, but I think it’s one of the classics best left remembered, and not re-lived. Maybe I’m just too desensitized to this kind of stuff to get anything out of ’em anymore, unless they’re one of my absolute favourites. Jason and Freddy still do it for me. Why not Leatherface? We may never know! I had something else to add… but it seems that I’ve forgotten due to overwhelming apathy. Oh well.

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