Guitar Hero: Smash Hits

If you ask the average consumer whether they preferred the Guitar Hero or Rock Band franchise, most would likely be curious what’s to prefer, since they’re both pretty much the same game at this point. If you asked someone very into gaming, however, the clear cut winner would be Rock Band nine times out of ten.

The game structure remains similar enough in both series that it won’t influence anyone’s opinions too heavily; what it really comes down to is how each game is sold. In the case of Rock Band, you either buy the Rock Band or Rock Band 2 game disc, and then it’s up to you to download extra music from the music store to enlarge your library as you see fit. On the other hand, Activision’s plan for Guitar Hero is to throw as many discs at us poor schlubs as possible, and offer very little in the way of DLC.

The big difference here is that with Rock Band, you get to choose which songs are added to your game, and you won’t have to pay for half-a-disc worth of songs you’re indifferent to or flat-out hate. Guitar Hero, on the other hand, forces you to buy the songs they want you to play. It’s a damn shame, but the franchise that started a revolution in music gaming has been poorly marketed and left behind the trend to the point where it’s starting to be passed over by people who are addicted to the genre. Myself included. Actually, it sounds a lot like Nintendo’s life story. Only I don’t see a Wii-sized comeback in Guitar Hero’s future.

With Activision flooding the market with “Hero”-branded games, it’s getting hard to keep up with all of them. I’ve purposefully neglected to buy two titles already, and I don’t see myself too interested in buying any of the upcoming games (with the exception Guitar Hero: Van Halen, obviously). The one GH game that I was very excited about, however, was Guitar Hero: Smash Hits. It may seem a bit redundant for me to want the “greatest Hits” version of a game series that I’ve been ragging on for being stale and overused, but I have a very good reason: these are the songs I want to play.

GH: Smash Hits contains a handful of the most popular tracks from all the GH series games that came before World Tour. This is important to me because these are the songs I played and obsessed over while I was still smitten with the genre. Only now they aren’t covers anymore. It brings back a ton of memories and while it follows the trend of running the Guitar Hero name into the ground, it’s got a few redeeming qualities that I’m very much enjoying.

The most obvious change, and the main reason of the game’s existence (other than another udder on Activision’s cash cow), is that all the songs can now be played with a full band, rather than being restricted to guitar and bass, or in the case of GH1 songs, guitar only. This alone does not add nearly enough value to justify my purchase, as I bought the Wii version, and I rarely do any multiplayering on my Wii. Also I do not own Wii drums and do not plan on buying any. What does add the value is that all the note charts have been mostly re-written, making use of all the new GH gimmicks like the slide bar sections and the open note on bass. Most songs are also a Hell of a lot harder, and these changes make the game seem fresh and adds a new challenge to songs I’d long since mastered. The only song that’s noticeably easier is ironically enough Dragonforce’s “Through the Fire and Flames”, which is now entirely possible to play through thanks to the slide bar sections.

The other little things that I really love are that the game finally provides a star meter. It was always a pain in the ass playing songs over and over, but never knowing exactly how far away you were from earning that fifth star. The game also lets you choose from any song right at the start of the game when you choose quickplay mode. It’s not something I would have ever benefited from, as I always blaze through career mode before touching anything else, but it’s a super-nice feature for casual players and people who just bought it and want to get the most out of it at a party they’re having that night. I dunno. Little things matter.

The career mode structure is also very nice. It’s back to the set list format, rather than World Tour‘s me-too gig setup. You unlock new sets by earning so many stars, and new sets unlock very, very quickly. Therefore, you can usually skip right to the songs you want to play without having to pick through too much of the other material. The only exception is the final set, which unlocks after you’ve played all the encore songs. But those are all the super-difficult songs anyway, and I doubt you want to play the new version of “Play With Me” without a nice, long warm-up anyway. (read: it’s very hard!)

I’d also like to make a little side note here, where must admit that I’ve forgotten how much fun it is to play these guitar-based games just for the sake of playing them. The last few I’ve been playing on the 360, and it’s really just become entirely about the achievements. Playing this on Wii has rekindled a lot of feelings of love for the actual gameplay, rather than the chase for arbitrary virtual medals. Just sayin’.

There are a couple of gripes I have with the game though. While the songs that Activision picked make an excellent roster of playable songs, the game only offers 40-some songs. This is essentially Guitar Hero’s Greatest Hits album, and everyone knows that the standard hits album is much longer than a band’s standard albums. There are 86 songs in World Tour, Guitar Hero 5 will have 85. We should have gotten at least 60 in Smash Hits (the entire GH1 soundtrack wouldn’t have been a bad idea). Also, there are no bonus songs! You earn money through career mode, but all it’s used for is bland clothing options. Get Ready 2 Rokk and Decontrol were probably my most-played tracks on GH1, so I’m very upset to see that no bonus songs from any of the GH games have been included. I expected Monkey Steals The Peach’s “Guitar Hero” at the very, very least.

But everything else aside, I really just bought Smash Hits because Guitar Hero doesn’t have a lag calibration option and nobody’s re-released it. All I really want is to play the first Guitar Hero game. That’s it. But I guess the fourteen tracks they provided here will be more than enough. I got what I really pined for-“Killer Queen”, “More Than a Feeling”, “Take it Off”, “Godzilla” and “Unsung”- but I sure do miss “Crossroads”, “Spanish Castle Magic”, “Texas Flood” and “Frankenstein”. Also, how could they possibly say this is the best of Guitar Hero music and have not included “Iron Man”. That’s like the biggest song ever. not a personal favourite, really, but it’s insanely well-known. Fuck, I think I’m just going to go play GH1 for a while, lag or not. I love those songs so much…

Rudy’s on a train

I’ve always secretly loved Valentine’s Day. Not because I’m a big fan of love and mushiness or anything, but because it always gave me a good reason to mope. I looked forward to the day because it was a day where I could lock myself in my room and be gloomy and have a “legitimate” reason for it. It was a day that celebrated couples, and I was single; in theory everyone who wasn’t in a relationship should be bummed. But not me. I love being sullen and whatnot, so it was always great for me. Don’t know why I enjoyed being alone and moody so much, that’s just how I was.

But now in 2009, I’m in a serious relationship, and Valentine’s Day is exactly the opposite of what it used to be. I got home from work and had to work my ass off to get everything cleaned up and dinner prepared in time. I spent the whole night with her instead of being all by my lonesome, and for the first time ever, I had a ton of fun on Valentine’s Day with someone other than myself. We didn’t do much, just had a nice home-cooked dinner, played Rock Band, ate a cake (yes, we ate an entire cake between the two of us), and muddled around on Facebook for a while. It wasn’t fancy or expensive, but it was perfect.

And now I’m sitting here thinking that despite the fact that this V-Day couldn’t be any more different from the old ways, there is one thing that they have in common: both types made me happy, just in different ways.

Promise not to stop when I say “when”

Well, it’s now the 24th of December, and I have successfully made one news post every day. Guess maybe I did have it in me after all. I know a couple were a bit crappy, but sometiimes that’s just how she goes.

Today, I was intending to talk about the best DLC for Rock Band, but I’d rather just make a bit of a spiel about how I hate working on computers that aren’t mine. See, I’m making this post from my girlfriend’s laptop, as I will not be home at all today, and I had to make the last post, right? But anyway, I’m finding this very uncomfortable. The whole compressed keyboard thing is a pain to adjust to, and making my typing way slower. Don’t get me wrong; it’s a vey nice laptop, and I wouldn’t mind owning one myself, but I just can’t stand adjusting to a new keyboard.

Much more of an issue is the fact that it’s running Windows Vista. Oh my God I hate Vista. It took me nearly half an hour to figure out how to access my FTP site or whatever through the network connections, and it really shouldn’t be that hard. I don’t think I could even do it again. And why doesn’t the “choose program” under “open with” have a bunch of default programs? I had to dig through the whole Windows directory to find the stupid Notepad. Notepad! And yes, I do all my HTMLing in Notepad. I’m sure it would be a lot easier with a program that would pick out wrong and useles code, but whatever. I’ve been doing it this way for six years, why change now? I hate change.

On a lighter note, we watched A Christmas Tale from that 6-movie set last night. It was actually a lot funnier than it was scary. The plot was about a bunch of kids who found a dangerous criminal who had fallen into a pit. She had robbed a bank, and the kids were trying to get her to give them the money before they’d help her out of the hole. Then there was voodoo and zombies and a slightly ambiguous ending. It was okay, nothing special. I think my favourite part was that there were four boys, and when they were coming up with nicknames to use while talking to the criminal, they named themselves after the A-Team. That was funny.

So yep. That concludes the 24 Days of Materialism. Hoped you enjoyed it as much as I hated finding a way to make a blog post every day for 24 days staight.

‘Till the day I die

Well, I have both victories and losses under my belt today, and neither is overly surprising, but I figure I might as well share. And before I start, it was Magma Man, not Volcano Man. Oops.

As I was mentioning in the last post, Mega Man 9 is friggin’ hard. The day after I made my little blog post there, I went back to the game with a stronger resolve and a good feeling. It got me pretty far, through five more bosses in fact, but Tornado Man and Hornet Man had still eluded my iron grip. But yester day I went back and made my play for total dominance. Tornado Man’s level was a bitch, and that’s all that was holding me back from the green-plated robot master. After dying over and over at his stupid revolving lifts (see video below), I decided I’d just cheese my way through with the Rush Jet. It worked wonders, but things only got worse from there on. Somehow I was able to scrape through to the end on my last life, and I slaughtered Tornado Man with little trouble. Hornet Man was much less offensive, as his level wasn’t too bad, but there’s a mini boss that will take you the fuck out many many times before you’re able to stomp it into robo-dust. But this time, I had the Tornado Blow on my side, and it wrecked him pretty bad. Hornet Man never saw it coming after that.

Of course, I got my ass handed to me on the first Wily level, and I felt that that was enough beatings for one day. But then I went and shelled out the necessary Wii Points for the extra DLC, and I’m pretty happy with what I got. The Challenge mode is pretty cool, and I think it’ll quickly evolve into an obsession. ProtoMan more is the star that really shines though. Not only can Blues slide, charge his buster, and block shots, but the Proto Whistle plays at the beginning of each level! It’s amazing! Really, it’s not a lot easier than Mega’s game, but it is the first real Mega Man game that allows you to play as ProtoMan (for $2).

And now for something completely different: would you be surprised if I told you I didn’t own Rock Band 2? Probably pretty shocked, right? But actually it’s a lie. I went out to Wal-Mart to buy candy last night, and meandered casually into the electronics department, and guess what was sitting there, ready to break my will into tiny little bits. Yeah, I think the only reason I hadn’t picked it up is because I hadn’t seen a copy available to be purchsed until then, not because I had a strong sense of not needing it. But I broke, and it’s great. The best part? That you can make standby band memers and assign them to empty spots on your roster so you don’t have the totally lame stock characters messing up your band’s image. Also, paying $60 for 100 tracks is a sweet deal after shelling out $1-$2 each for single tracks over the last 9 months.

So far beyond the sun

A couple weeks ago, Activision or Microsoft or whoever does the Xbox Marketplace stuff released a trio of new Dragonforce tunes for Guitar Hero 3, and I promptly downloaded thems. I was completely destroyed by them even more promtly. Promptlyer. Promptlier. C:\ prompt. Anyway, one of the tunes, called “Heroes of Our Time” was from their newest CD. I assumed it was a “Saints of Los Angeles” kind of thing where they were promoting the new album before its release. Nope. Turns out it was already out. Also, I bought it.

So it’s not so much that I don’t like Ultra Beatdown, it’s not that at all. I love Dragonforce. I love the balls-to-the-wall speed metal. It’s great. I just have one complaint: the lyrics. I know for something like this you can’t expect particularly deep or meaningful lyrics, but Dragonforce has taken it past the pop level of shitty lyrics. I was reading along in the cover booklet, and that’s pretty much exactly when I realized that not one song on this album has lyrics that make any sense.

I’m not sure if it’s an epidemic that plagues all of Dragonforce’s work, but if you take a look at the words to any of the songs on Ultra Beatdown, you’ll notice that they seem very chopped up and sporadic. It’s not uncommon for a line to have absolutely nothing to do with the one that comes after it, and sometimes it seems like a single line is made of two that were chopped in half and then had one piece from each put together. I have no idea how any of the songs could even possibly be pretending to be following the same general theme, nevermind the same train of thought. It’s like whoever wrote them just put words on a page and then changed a few so that it rhymed and followed something of a rhythm pattern.

It’s not really a huge put-off, but I do have a soft spot for thoughtful and/or intelligent songwriting. Ultra Beatdown is great if you’re going to be driving fast or for using as background music while playing a video game or something, but it’s definitely not meant to just be listened to and absorbed. But then again, Dragonforce was never that kind of band to begin with, so really, I guess I’m a little surprised that I expeced more from them in that way.

Your face is a mess

So Kellogg’s or whoever it is that makes Fruit Loops has got a neat promotion going on right now. In boxes of certain cereals, they’re giving away little electronic Guitar Hero games. Sounds good, right? Well, my mom thought I would go nuts for the little guys, so she’s started buying lots of Fruit Loops so that I can collect them all. Only I was never overly intrigued by them in the first place.

And now that I actually have a couple of them, I’m no longer apathetic to their existence. Nope. More of a “slightly annoyed” feeling, really.

See, these little things are a neat idea, and for a cereal box freebie they’re not bad, but they mostly just bastardize the Guitar Hero name (not that Activision hasn’t been toeing that line for a while now). The black one is your standard cheap-ass LCD game. It gets the GH formula down pretty well, with notes scrolling down and whatnot. You have to hold the correct button and hit the strum bar when the note hits the target area. Pretty decent, no? No! There’s no sound! I didn’t expect music or anything, but there aren’t even the standard blips and bloops that come with these little games. It ruins the entire point.

Our red friend is perhaps the exact opposite. There is no game to speak of, which sort of gives it the spirit of real guitar playing over toy guitar playing, but it isn’t at all interesting after about 20 seconds. Each fret button plays a different repeating riff that plays for a couple seconds, and the whammy bar plays what I’ll refer to as “effect notes”. Basically a note or small phrase that’s been tweaked a bit. The idea, according to the back of the box, is to radically modify your notes for a killer sound or something to that effect. Nope. There’ll be none of that here. Pressing a fret button and then the whammy bar does not change modify the riff, but rather it just plays an effect note over top of the riff. Whoo.

There are two other toys in the set as well. One is an amp that plays a lead, rhythm and bass riff, and you can turn them on and off to make whatever combination your heart desires. But it’ll always just play the same three-second melody over and over. There’s also a “star power meter” thingy that provides another falling object game akin to that of the black guitar. Really, these are just a waste of plastic and whatever small bits of electronics they need to work, but because of them, my mother has temporarily lifted her Fruit Loops ban, and I can’t totally hate on anything that provides me with a means to a Fruit Loop. It’s just lucky that ol’ mom hasn’t noticed that these come in a wide variety of cereal boxes.

Tell me that I’m not all alone

I know just as well as anyone that I’ve been doing an absolutely atrocious job of keeping a blog as of late. I ‘ve been slacking of on my comicing duties pretty badly too, and does anyone remember when the last time I wrote an article was? Sad to say, but I don’t really see that changing anytime soon. I’d like to be able to just blame all the crazy hours I’ve been working lately, but I think we all know that it’s because I’ve been spending most of my free time on something a wee bit more important than websites that nobody reads.

So, whether my blog is shitty or not, I just popped in to say that I picked up Guitar Hero DS yeterday, and am still on the fence about whether I’m impressed with the job they did. The game itself is just fine, it’s got pretty much all the Guitar Hero frills, just watered down a little so that it could all fit on the tiny DS card. And speaking of fitting, there are 25 songs in the game, and the sound quality is as good as I’ve heard on the DS, as long as you’re pumping it through external speakers or headphones; Mr T. pities the foo who settles for the DS speakers. The setlist itself is way under par for a Guitar Hero game, including a bunch of songs that really have no business there (Maroon 5? WTF?), but I suppose we can chalk the somewhat more varied musical range to that fact that the DS has that huge “casual” following, and most of the old people I know don’t particularly enjoy metal and punk. I’ll be happy though, as it does feature “Spiderwebs” by No Doubt, and as I’ve told pretty much everyone I know, I love Tragic Kingdom and almost every song from it. Also, “Jessie’s Girl”! How can you not love that song?

The issue that I have with it is with the insane little guitar grip peripheral that is used to play the game. Oh, it works fine, and I eventually found my most comfortable way to hold it, but the problem is that it’s too small. Actually that’s a poor choice of words. What I meant to say is that the buttons are way too close together. Normally it’s passable, but once you get onto the expert level and try to mash your way through some of the harder solos, you’re just fucked because your fingers will be mashing each other and everything just goes to Hell. Even small hammer-on/pull-off sequences can be tricky. If they had just added about a quarter of an inch between each button, things would be so much better, and the contraption wouldn’t even be that much bigger. So yeah, other than the fact that I’ll never be good at soloing on it, I’ll give Guitar Hero DS a passing grade. I just hope that they whip up an improved grip for the inevitable sequel.

We’re all bought and sold

A while back, I sent in my Wii copy of Guitar Hero 3 to be replaced with a disc that could output audio at more than a mono level. It took a really really long time for it to come back, but it has, and about a week before it did, I received something completely different from RedOctane and Activision.

Hooray for good customer service! I honestly haven’t even seen an official faceplate for the Wii Les Paul, much less was I going to pay $15 for one even if I had. But now I have one for free. And an impersonal letter of apology! But best of all, I can FINALLY play “Cult of Personality” again. It seriously took way too long to get my replacement disc.

Whatcha gonna do?

You may have heard something recently about the next Guitar Hero game. If you haven’t, I have some news that may disturb or excite you: It’s all Aerosmith. Yeah. Harsh. I mean, it’s just an “expansion” like the 80’s edition, but still. There are a lot of other bands I’d much rather have entire Guitar Hero games based on. Off the top of my head, let’s see…

  • Tesla
  • Helix
  • The Ataris
  • Rush
  • Sons of Butcher

And the list goes on, really. I mean, I like Aerosmith, but a whole game worth of them is a lot to take. I really don’t see myself buying into this one. Which is sad, because I’m pretty much ready to drop money on new Guitar Hero games at the drop of the hat. But Aerosmith… Man, I really wish it was Tesla instead. I fuckin’ love Tesla.

Satisfaction guarantees

It’s kind of sad that despite how much I enjoy Guitar Hero 3, I’ve almost completely neglected it ever since Rock Band came into my home. I feel bad for this, but aside from maybe like “F.C.P.R.E.M.I.X.” and “Knights of Cydonia”, the song list is at least 27 times better in Rock Band. It may have something to do with the infinitely superior DLC support; I suppose you just can’t compete with new material every week. I’m still waiting on a Def Leppard pack though.

As much weight as the track list may carry, the other big difference is the drum kit. I mainly play alone (or online, which isn’t much different), so the multiplayer aspect isn’t a huge draw, but those drums are like a little bit of Heaven. They’re extremely hard to learn, but I’ve got it down to the point where I can at least manage to scrape through most songs on hard, so I’m doing okay as far as game progress goes. But just playing for fun, the normal difficulty is more than enough. It provides a challenge, but doens’t have quite enough tricks to really throw you off. Learning to play the drum kit has given me a much bigger satisfaction payoff than playing the plastic guitar ever did. It feels absolutely amazing just to pound away to the beat, and accomplishing hard sections without missing a note is total bliss. I could recommend Rock Band based on the drum section alone.

Did I mention that drumming is the greatest way to relieve tension ever? No? Well it is. Seriously, I can boot up the game and be all stressed or whatever other negative emotions might plague the human soul, and by the time I’m two songs in I feel like I’m on top of the world. It’s like a magic cure for the blues.

As much as I would love to continue jabbering on about drums and Rock Band, or Hell, actually playing the game, I have homework to do. Yeah. Homework. From work. Trying to get ahead is a pain.